Tantric (Episode 2)
By Char Chaffin and T Bishop

Category: MSR, X-File

Rated: NC-17

Disclaimer: as stated in Episode 1

Feedback: We'd love it!  
          Char     Char@chaffin.com
          Teresa   TBishop27@mindspring.com

Missing parts?  Or want to read more of our stories?  Go to our 
archive pages:
 
The Literary G-Spot (T Bishop's archive)
http://members.xoom.com/arcticfox42/Tbishop.htm 
http://tbishop.freeservers.com/

Believe the Words (Char's archive)
http://char.chaffin.com

TANTRIC, (Episode 2)


CHAPTER 10


"What are you reading now, Dana?" Mulder leans over and plants a 
few soft kisses on my neck as I sit lotus position beside the 
pool, enjoying some of our scheduled free time.  It's been an 
amazing week.  And while we haven't gotten any closer to solving 
our case, Mulder and I have certainly gotten closer.  So far so 
good on that.  Maybe I was wrong to be afraid of it all these 
years.  The sex has been unbelievable, and once we got past 
Mulder's guilt phase, our relationship has never been stronger.

I tilt my head to the side and enjoy the feel of Mulder's lips as 
they travel slowly up to my ear.  "Lessons of the Kama Sutra... 
mmm... It's a guide book Swami Saraswati recommended."

"You're really getting into this stuff."  He rolls his tongue 
around inside my ear, knowing that it always makes me shudder.

"It's fascinating, actually."

"Is my Catholic girl thinking of converting?"

"No.  Nothing like that.  Tantra embraces all faiths.  You are 
not asked to make a departure from your status of life when you 
accept its practices.  It's not a religion as much as it is a 
spiritual science involving methods of going into the 
subconscious mind and diving deep into the unconscious mind... to 
clear up your personality, your deep-rooted complexes, to correct 
your behavior, to rehabilitate you psychologically and 
physically.  Tantra is also Kundalini Yoga, the purpose of which 
is to awaken the powerful consciousness in man in order to make 
it possible for him to have a greater reality in himself."

"You've been spending too much time with Swami-boy," he whispers 
in my ear, then takes a seat beside me on the ground.

There are a few other couples enjoying the pool today as we wait 
for dinner and the evening seminar.  I wasn't able to salvage my 
bikini, but we were all allowed a brief visit into the small 
village that passes as civilization on this island paradise, 
where I managed to pick up a suitable replacement... with 
Mulder's help of course.  

My handsome partner has developed quite a tan after six days 
under the tropic sun.  I've managed a slight tinge of pink to my 
normally pale skin... Mulder calls it a healthy glow.  If I'm 
glowing it has more to do with the affects of Fire-God Mulder 
than exposure to sunlight.  The man is insatiable... not that I'm 
complaining.  I think we're both making up for years of sexual 
deprivation.

"Dana, what do you say we head back to our little love shack and 
partake of some holy communion, Tantra style?"

Um hmm... insatiable, but it brings a smile to my lips.  
"Actually, as appealing as that is... I really want to finish 
reading this book before tonight's lecture."

"You're serious about this stuff?"

"I'm surprised you're not more into it..."

"I'd make a lousy Tantrist, sweetheart.  I'm a bit more goal 
oriented when it comes to sex.  This holding off orgasm crap 
isn't for me.  When that Yogi pretzel guy told us he denied 
himself the big O for, what was it...?  Nine years?  That pretty 
much turned me off on the subject."

"He was seeking awakening... and anyway, that kind of extreme 
dedication is not required of all practitioners.  Don't be so 
close minded, my love."

Mulder laughs.  "That's me, Mr. Closed-Minded.  What's gotten 
into you?"

I grin at him.

"Well... besides me."

"I don't know.  I'm just interested... I think I experienced some 
level of awakening... that first time."  Damn, I know I'm 
blushing.  "It was so powerful.  I started thinking there could 
actually be something to all this."  I shrug.  "I'm a scientist. 
 Call it research."

"Far be it for me to stand in the way of scientific studies.  As 
long as I can be your lab assistant, Dr. Dana."  He puts his hand 
on my thigh and gives a gentle squeeze, offering me a provocative 
leer.

"I was thinking of you more in the position of project director."

The Master of Innuendo doesn't miss a beat.  "I'm imagining both 
of us in quite a number of positions actually."  His hand slides 
up the length of my leg until he reaches the pulse point of my 
femoral artery, fingers gently brushing over the chartreuse 
fabric of my new bikini.

Maybe I can finish reading this later...

                 ~~~~~~

Hard to believe we've been here a week - but we have.  It's flown 
by, with neither of us any closer to understanding why seventeen 
couples disappeared, or what may have become of them.  I have a 
suspicion that maybe Scully is right after all; it may be as 
simple as a desire amongst them, to learn everything there is to 
know about the Tantra - involving no more than a decision to 
squirrel themselves away from the civilized world for a period of 
twelve years, while they continue to receive lessons and guidance 
from their very own Gurus.  Then again... it could be more 
sinister than that.   I say this not to accuse anyone on Abaco; I 
think this goes beyond them. 

I have been approached by Swami Saraswati; although I was 
expecting some sort of one-on-one contact with him, I was taken 
aback somewhat by his enthusiasm; apparently he thinks Scully and 
I could become the next matched set of Swamis.  It's true we have 
embraced the Tantra fully, within one short week of being here.  
I guess it didn't take us long to figure out what we truly needed 
out of life.  Well, it didn't take Scully long... not long at 
all.  Scully has found a new Truth within herself... and I am so 
glad for her; glad to see the last vestiges of her solitary, 
stiff existence melt away, as she studies the Tantra and absorbs 
its teachings like a sponge.  

Boy, does she ever absorb it! I may not survive the sponging.  I 
have managed thus far to stay abreast of her, so to speak - by 
reading right along with her, by attending all the classes and 
the private sessions; by using my body and hers as test subjects 
for all aspects of the Tantra dynamic.  And Scully makes one 
incredible test subject, taking me to levels I have never before 
even thought of reaching, never mind achieving.  Last night... 
God. Last night she spent an hour closeted in the bathroom; I 
assumed she was taking a bath.  Wrong-o... she'd been reading 
again.  The Swami had given her a thin manual, some sort of 
pressure techniques using the hands of both partners.  She 
breezed into our bedroom smelling deliciously of jasmine and 
musk, wearing nothing but a tiny nightslip, and a smile... hair 
damp and wavy from the bath steam.  I had been half-heartedly 
flipping through a set of illustrated positions, turning them 
sideways and upside down, just to amuse myself because I was 
bored.  She jumped into the bed, tore the illustrations out of my 
hands and pushed me down on the pillows with one hand while the 
other twitched off my boxers slicker than a well-oiled owl (not 
that I ever saw a well-oiled owl... but I digress). 

Her eyes intense and bluer than I'd ever seen them, she ran five 
hot fingers over my hips and around to my ass, avoiding my 
suddenly-straining cock, slid three of her fingers between my 
tight cheeks and, still holding my gaze with hers, crooked her 
middle finger and slid it into me, pressing with the tip while 
her tiny knuckles actually wiggled sideways.  God knows how she 
learned to be so dexterous, but... suffice to say the move 
brought me up, immediately hard and swollen to the max; in all my 
adult life it had never happened that fast.  With just one 
crooked finger she kept me there, for what seemed an eternity, 
while her tongue slipped and curled its way over my balls and up 
and down my straining length; each time I felt myself beginning 
to pump, she moved her finger a fraction and the need stemmed; I 
was sweating from every pore, gasping for breath and arched like 
a bow - and she was only touching me with the tip of her tongue 
and a few fingers.  I found myself alternately gasping, cursing 
every frigging deity in the Heavens and begging her to never 
stop...

That was last night.


Today is our last day on Abaco; today we have to make a 
decision... to go back to DC and report to Skinner that we have 
been unsuccessful in discovering anything further on the missing 
couples; or stay on in another capacity; one which I find as 
exciting as it is scary.  Early this morning, coming back from my 
run, Swami Sariswati approaches me as I rub at my sweat-laced 
hair with a towel, there on the beach.  Wearing his customary 
black loose jammies and a white turban, the Swami is all smiles 
as he greets me and asks for a minute of my time.  We find an 
empty table on the main lanai and sit down with glasses of papaya 
juice.  

"I wanted to talk to you, Fox - about how pleased I am by yours 
and Dana's excellent progress in learning and adapting the Tantra 
to fit your own lives and your intimate relationship."  The Swami 
is a tad on the pompous side, but I have already determined his 
intentions to be good, and he seems to genuinely care about his 
students.  "I will of course speak to Dana as well, but I am 
curious - do you have a desire to take your Tantra a step 
further?  Do you wish to learn more about your sexual awakening 
in such a way as to bring complete satisfaction  and a spiritual 
maturity the likes of which you have never known?"  

My brows lift questioningly at his words, at the bright passion 
and purpose glowing behind his eyes, his smile - and of course my 
curiosity is piqued.  How can it not be?  I have seen for myself 
the fullness, the overwhelming oneness of the Swami's 
relationship with his partner, Narr... and I would like nothing 
better than to achieve even a tenth of that with Scully.  

Besides, we need a legitimate reason to continue investigating - 
and I have a feeling it's been offered to us.  So I smile at the 
Swami, and put on my enthusiasm face (actually, about the same 
look as my panic face).  "Tell me more, Swami..."

~~~~~~

CHAPTER 11


"It's a great opportunity, Mulder... in ways which will mean the 
most to us - we can continue to investigate, although I still 
think there's really nothing left there - and we can expand our 
relationship and grow in Tantric perfection..."

Late afternoon, and we are relaxing on the lanai outside our 
bungalow, snuggled in one oversized lounger, Scully leaning back 
between my legs.  The sun is beginning to drop a little, getting 
big and orange in the almost-lavender sky.  It's been a busy day; 
we've had two seminars already and because these were mostly 
demonstration only... I was feeling very strung-out.  The morning 
seminar featured a tactile demonstration of various Erosha 
massage techniques that had my head spinning, and then this 
afternoon a continuation of the same lecture had us practicing 
some of the massages on each other.  We were allowed to use 
erosflow techniques to induce a state of full-body arousal, but 
we were denied permission to complete the circle, to achieve 
oneness.  By the time the seminar was over and we were allowed to 
return to our room... there was so little left of our respective 
sanity that we ripped, tore and plundered, all the way to the 
bathroom, all the way through the shower and drying off right on 
up to the moment we actually collapsed in the lounger and 
prepared to discuss the immediate future.

Now Scully presses back against me and wiggles a bit to catch 
just the right position of comfort, and I stifle a groan and 
concentrate instead on her soft voice as she weighs the pros and 
cons of working with our very own personal guru.  As she pauses 
for breath, I jump in with a few questions of my own.  After all, 
we are contemplating the placement of our own personal Tantra 
into a stranger's hands... I don't care how wonderful he may be, 
or how highly recommended he is.

"Scully, what do we really know about this guy?  We could be 
taking a big chance, and this is a huge commitment we are 
considering.  It worries me... not the commitment we've made to 
each other of course, but whatever this Master guru thinks he can 
do for couples like us who are interested in Tantric growth... 
there are a lot of con artists out there. I mean, anyone can plop 
a rag on their head and wear an oversized diaper and change their 
name to something exotic, and claim to know the secrets of the 
Chakra, if they have enough funding and like to read books..." 
Scully cuts off my words with a hand slapped over my mouth, her 
expression amused and a bit exasperated, and interrupts me 
gently.

"Mulder, I'm way ahead of you - I did some checking, and he's 
legitimate.  Master Baet-mi Vishnu Indra Yidah... impressive 
academic background and a history of counseling equally as 
impressive... I printed it out; you can see for yourself... why 
are you laughing?  Stop that...!"  For I begin convulsing with 
chortles as soon as she says the guy's name.

"Master Baet-mi, Scully?  Ooo, any time you're ready, Darlin'..." 
 Her eyebrows shoot up to her hairline and she's biting her lip 
to keep the chuckle contained, as I continue.  "You have got to 
be kidding!  With a name like that, I wouldn't be able to look 
him in the eye, much less accept Tantra guidance from him!  Are 
you sure he's not just plain old 'Joe Schmoe', from Hoboken?"  
That earns me another Scullyglance, almost a glare; she gets to 
her feet, heads for the bathroom, tossing a parting retort over 
her shoulder at me, still lounging in the chair.

"I'm taking a nap, Mulder... wake me when you're ready for 
dinner.  And if you're so worried about the Master Yidah, why 
don't you look him up on the internet?"

Thirty minutes later, I am booting up my laptop.  Behind me in 
the darkened room, Scully is curled up in the soft sheets of our 
bed, sound asleep, and I decide to skip the full dinner this 
evening and maybe just grab some fruit later on.  I'm not hungry 
anyhow... I just began reading through a copious amount of email; 
much of it from Skinner.  I'm sure he's demanding to know how the 
undercover work is coming along, and when we are coming home.  I 
wish I knew the answers to both of those questions...  I see a 
message from my mother's legal office, and open it rather warily. 
 I am still so raw where Mom's death was concerned - and I don't 
know how long it will take for me to reach true closure.

The email is from Petersen-Fitch, the law firm which had handled 
Mom's affairs for all of her life.  I am wary; don't know why.  
Premonition?  Maybe... I take a deep breath, and read:

Mr. Mulder:  

I understand from your Assistant Director, a Mr. Skinner, that 
you are out of the office for an undisclosed period of time.  If 
you get this message, you need not do anything unless you wish to 
challenge.  Though quite frankly, you would have nothing to 
challenge about.

Your mother's Last Will and Testament was read yesterday; sorry 
we could not wait for you to get back, but due to legalities we 
were under a time limit where the reading was concerned.  I will 
not go into excruciating detail right now; just relay to you the 
facts.

Your mother has basically left everything to you, as you may have 
expected.  By everything I assume you will understand the scope 
of her material wealth - however I will briefly outline for you. 
 There are three homes, the larger being the house in Chilmark, 
Massachusetts, which was I believe your childhood home; also the 
house where your father, William Mulder, resided until his death, 
on Martha's Vineyard.  There is also a smaller home in 
Williamsburg, Virginia. Your mother purchased it ten years ago as 
an investment, and since it is owned free and clear, and is also 
one of the oldest homes in Colonial Williamsburg, it is of course 
quite valuable.  Appraisal comes in at just over $650,000.  Total 
appraisal on the other two homes comes in at $325,000, and 
$410,000, respectively.

There is also a three-hundred acre spread of land just outside of 
Williamsburg, bordering the county line on one side and the 
National Historical Park on the other.  Again, very valuable, and 
owned free and clear.  Appraisal comes in at just under 
$1,435,000.

There are also various stocks, bonds and notes, and several 
savings accounts; again I won't go into the detail now.  I can 
send you that information at a later date.  Total on these amount 
to little over $1.8 million dollars, give or take normal stock 
market flux.  You mother had no outstanding bills, no IOUs, and 
no committed charities.  She gave $2,000 a year to Rosh Haddish 
Synagogue on Martha's Vineyard, and always in the form of a legal 
endowment check.

There is also a lump appraised amount of roughly $492,000, for 
furnishings; three vehicles including a vintage Jaguar appraised 
at $150,000 and various jewelry pieces which are all safely 
locked in your mother's vault at the Williamsburg house.  Jewelry 
appraises at roughly $79,000, since there are several excellent 
antique pieces belonging to your paternal grandmother, and a 
collection of diamond pieces passed down from your maternal 
great-grandmother.  

Therefore, your total appraised gross worth comes in at around 
$5,341,000; we would expect to see you able to clear and net at 
least $3.8 million, after taxes and assorted penalties.

If you have any questions concerning your inheritance - and I am 
sure you will - please contact me via this email.  I will expect 
to hear from you upon completion of your current assignment.  We 
can set up a meeting with a good investment broker and financial 
advisor, and also get immediate funds signed over to your 
accounts.

My sympathies on your recent loss, and please allow me to assist 
you wherever needed-

Sincerely,
J. Joseph Fein, Attorney
Petersen Fitch Law Offices


Holy SHIT... with home fries... 

I stare at the tiny screen, not able to assimilate what I have 
just read.  I cannot believe it... I don't want to accept it, or 
even imagine what this kind of wealth could mean to me.

When...?  When did my mother become Queen of the financial world, 
and amasser of valuable stuff?

I can't accept this... I just can't.  My mother... proud owner 
of... Colonial history?  Vintage Jaguars?  Bank accounts and 
stocks and notes?  Three point eight million dollars net total...

Jesus.

I prop my suddenly-aching head in my hands, and stare unseeingly 
at the tinted screen, struggling to understand my new 
affluence... asking myself if I really want it... knowing I have 
no choice.  I have no family left... except Samantha.  So, 
technically I suppose I could say I have no family left.  I never 
have to work another day in my life... except to continue the 
search for my sister.

Let's just see if I can put this into some sort of proper 
perspective.

I have the means to live out the rest of my life as an eccentric 
millionaire, using my resources and whatever sort of connections 
this wealth brings me... to conduct my own private search for my 
sister.  Unless I give up the ghost, as my mother did... in which 
case I technically become an only child, as well as an orphan. 

I can pursue a life with Scully; one we could never have 
imagined; one which affords both of us the luxury of doing 
whatever we please for as long as it pleases us... we can remain 
involved with the Tantra lifestyle, and let this Masterbater guru 
person train us in the more complex aspects of achieving our 
ultimate goal: sexual and spiritual oneness with each other.  I 
can do this; I can have this; have it all.

Or I can proceed on the premise that locating Samantha is still 
on my horizon and within reach, if I leave myself the 
opportunities and the network of resources which have less to do 
with money and more to do with dedication and hard work. I can 
proceed with the heart-held knowledge that my sister will be 
found, and when she is... how wonderful it would be to hand her 
the key to a house, and the jewel box which I am sure resides in 
the vault (God, my mother had a vault!) in the house in Colonial 
Williamsburg... and whisper into her ear, "Welcome Home, Sis..."

Wonderful, indeed.

The island world outside our open lanai is settling soft and 
deepest blue, as I slowly close down the laptop and put it away; 
shrug out of my swim trunks and spoon my tired body behind 
Scully's; she stirs for only a second, long enough to murmur into 
the pillow, "Mmm, Mulder... love you..." before she is deeply 
asleep again.  I have a lot to think about, but I think for now I 
will lay my troubled mind down on the pillow next to my baby, and 
cup one sweet breast as I allow myself to doze... to dream.  
Before I surrender to it completely, I press a featherlight kiss 
into Scully's nape - and feel her hand slip between our bodies 
and encompass my cock, holding it lightly, warmly... 
protectively.  I sigh, and drift... perfect.

Why do I have the feeling that this is the last truly perfect 
moment we may have for a very long time?

In the end, we make a decision, and stick with it.  We opt for 
the training, and the chance to further our investigation.  We 
opt to explore ourselves as well as our ever-expanding sexual 
relationship.  We go to the island of our new Guru.

~~~~~~



CHAPTER 12


By the time we finally arrive on Mohona it is dusk.  We are 
escorted by our guide, a young man calling himself Manu, to what 
can only be described as a crude compound of sorts.  Torch lights 
give the whole place an eerie glow.  There is a large central 
building, constructed of indigenous materials and two smaller 
structures, of the same, that look as though they are used for 
storage purposes.  Several shelter-like canopies are dispersed 
amongst the small tropical forest surrounding the compound, and 
it is apparent by the condition of these sites that most of the 
daily living on Mohona takes place out of doors.  There are mats, 
probably for sleeping and Yoga, with only thatched roofs to keep 
them dry in case of inclement weather.  Some have partial walls 
erected for privacy.  Primitive is the only way to describe it.  
Frighteningly so.

As we approach the main building we can hear voices inside... 
chanting.  Manu explains that Master Yidah is performing the Rite 
of the Naked Fire. 

"I read about this in one of the texts Swami Saraswati loaned me. 
 Tantric tradition observes the custom of keeping a sacred fire 
burning.  The lighting of the fire involves a ceremony, a 
chanting of Mantras as an invocation, and an oration, usually 
given by a Guru...  Once lit, the fire is regarded as sacred, the 
ashes are used to mark the body.  While the origin of the 
ceremony is lost to antiquity, it continues to be a custom 
observed by most sects of Tantric and Yoga traditions."  

"Yes," Manu agrees with me.  "It is a beautiful ceremony.  Master 
Yidah believes strongly in the power of group meditation."

We are not allowed to enter the building as the sacred rite has 
already begun, but Manu holds the door slightly ajar so that 
Mulder and I may observe the activities inside.  The first and 
most obvious observation is the state of complete undress of the 
entire group.  

Mulder leans close and whispers in my ear.  "Scully, what have 
you gotten us into?"

I throw him a look, but immediately return my attention to the 
ceremony.  Everyone is kneeling around a central fire pit, 
chanting a Mantra...'OM NAMAH SHIVAYA!  OM NAMAH SHIVAYA! OM 
NAMAH SHIVAYA!'

And then we get our first glimpse of what must be Master Yidah.  
Dressed in a ceremonial robe made of red silk, he is the only 
participant wearing any clothing.  As he approaches the center of 
the circle and the firelight illuminates him, I am taken aback by 
the beauty of this man.  He has a strong, commanding presence... 
tall, maybe 6'1", well built, roughly 195 pounds.  His hair is 
long and black and he wears it pulled back in a ponytail. He has 
well tanned skin and the most intriguing blue eyes I have ever 
seen, even from across the room they are mesmerizing.  In my 
estimate, I would approximate his age to be mid to late forties. 
He moves through the circle more gracefully than one would 
expect.

Standing in front of the fire, he begins the oration in a deep 
baritone voice that sends a chill through me the minute I hear 
him speak.

"One fire, One God, One World, One people;  Ignorance transforms 
the One into many," he says. 

"Homage and Salutations to the Naked Fire!" chant the followers 
in unison.

"As fire burns we destroy delusion and bondage, Leaving only the 
white ash of Liberation."

"Homage and Salutations to the Naked Fire!" they repeat again.

"In the Naked Fire the mind regenerated, Fit to attain the vision 
of Reality."

"Homage and Salutations to the Naked Fire!"  

This back and forth goes on for quite a while.  The Guru holding 
his hands alternately over the fire and up to the heavens, 
speaking the words of the oration and being responded to by the 
group.  It ends with a Mantra as before, and the marking of each 
participant's forehead with ashes from the edges of the fire.  I 
can feel Mulder's body growing tense behind me.  He is 
uncomfortable with this.  It actually reminds me of a more 
primeval version of the Masses I have attended all my life.  I 
would be uncomfortable with it too though, if I hadn't researched 
enough to know that they are not worshipping the fire, it is only 
a disciplined process of freeing the mind... a relaxation 
technique if you take it to extreme definition.  As the rite 
ends, the Tantrists wrap themselves in simple white cotton 
bathrobes, and file out of the hut, mostly in pairs.  Only five 
participants, all of them female, remain behind, and take up 
places around the Guru who has seated himself in a large wicker 
chair in one corner of the room.

Manu tells us that we may enter now.  I take Mulder's hand in 
mine, intertwining our fingers, feeling the need for his support 
as this has suddenly become very intimidating.  I am reminded of 
the feelings I experienced as a child whenever a bishop would 
visit our parish and everyone would address him as Your 
Excellency.  I was always very intimidated in the presence of 
these spiritual leaders.

We are introduced to the Guru by our guide.  "Master Yidah, I 
present to you your newest students, Fox and Dana.  They have 
just completed their indoctrination week, under the supervision 
of Swami Bharata Saraswati, and wish to seek your guidance in 
further Awakening their Chakras and gaining the means with which 
to hold onto the awareness of heightened consciousness."  He bows 
his head in respect and slowly fades into the background as 
Master Yidah looks Mulder and me over, his crystal blue eyes 
finally coming to rest, gazing into my own.

"I am Baet-mi Vishnu Yidah, Master of Tantra, Spiritual Guru of 
the Church of the Seven Chakras.  You may call me Master Yidah.  
Welcome Fox and Dana to the island of Mohona."  He stands and 
steps forward to meet us, extending a hand to touch each of us on 
the shoulder, but never once does his eyes stray from mine... or 
mine from his.  Yes, mesmerizing is definitely the right word to 
describe this man's eyes.  Not until I hear Mulder clear his 
throat, is the spell finally broken and I manage to tear myself 
away from his stare.

"You will both sleep here at the fire tonight, and in the morning 
Manu will see to it that you receive accommodations.  This is a 
spiritual place, as you will come to discover; we haven't the 
need for much in the way of material possessions or lavish 
comforts.  All your needs will be provided for during your stay 
with us of course."

On his words, an incredibly beautiful woman, wearing nothing more 
than the skimpiest sarong at her hips, steps out of a door at the 
back of the room.  She's carrying two robes for Mulder and me, 
and I can't help the twinge of jealousy I feel when Mulder gives 
her the once over... twice.

"This is the only clothing you will require during your training. 
 You should dress; and we will have tea before you retire for the 
evening.  The lovely Goddess Madhu will be happy to assist you." 

~~~~~~

I don't like this... I don't.  

Over the years I have learned to fly by the seat of my instincts 
because they are sound and practical, even if I'm not.  I don't 
think we should be here, though I agreed to it, agreed with 
Scully that not only do we need the expansion of Tantra for us, 
but also for the investigation.  Yes, we hit a dead end on Abaco, 
but we could have called it quits - could have gone back to DC 
and done more intense digging.  Undercover doesn't always work - 
I've been in a few unsuccessful ones, I know how they can go 
down.  Skinner knows too - and he would have understood.  

I just don't like this.  What we witnessed as we first approached 
the main compound, this Rite of the Naked Fire... it made me 
uncomfortable.  I am not sure why exactly, but I felt invaded; 
felt as if the chanting and the anointing of ash would brand me 
right where I stood.  It smacked of paganism in its most base 
form, and had less to do with religion as it had to do with 
magic.  I don't like this.

Scully is clearly affected by this Yidah joker; I can see it in 
her eyes.  Either the man exudes Tagara through his pores, or 
else he's a very talented mesmerizer.  I suspect both - Hell, I 
could feel it too.  Maybe to a lesser degree, it's true, but I 
feel it.  This is a very charismatic man, and I would have to be 
blind not to notice how a woman could react to him, drugs or not. 
 The drugs... I sure wish we could get around that one.  Scully 
can't handle the drugs; not that I do any better, but she is 
especially vulnerable.  

I ask myself: why are we really here?  How far removed is the 
true answer from the need to continue this investigation; rather 
than learn more about ourselves?  I ask myself how badly I want 
the Tantra in my life.  Do I need it?  No... but I want it, 
because Scully wants it.  I want it - but that doesn't mean I'm 
gonna be stupid about it.  I will expand my world; I will allow 
the growth; I will embrace the Tantra.

I will also protect my partner's back.

~~~~~~

Tea.  This doesn't taste like any tea I've ever had before.  Not 
even the weird herbal stuff Missy used to drink. I take another 
cautious sip and look at Mulder who seems to be having a similar 
reaction to this horrible bitter brew.  We don't want to be rude 
to Master Yidah, so we drink up despite its pungency.

It's quite a warm evening.  We sit beside the low burning sacred 
fire watching the gentle flames dancing upon the charred wood.  
The smoke curls above the blaze and wanders slowly towards the 
paneless windows... drifting out into the moonlit night... 
trailing up to the sky like an apparitious snake.  

Master Yidah reclines against pillows that have been placed 
around the ceremonial pyre, his harem of beauties gathered all 
around him, and speaks to us of the lessons of the Kama Sutra.  
His voice rumbles on and I hope that Mulder is listening because 
I have suddenly lost focus on what he is saying... but I can 
still hear him speaking.  Funny that I don't seem to be able to 
follow his words...  The smoke continues climbing skyward; and I 
think that if I tried I might be able to follow it up and see 
just how high it goes... up to the stars... up into space... 
up... up... floating above the world... looking down... so 
high... I'm so high... How did I get here?  Shouldn't follow 
smoke... bad idea... where there's smoke there's fire...mmm... 
fire is beautiful, warm and inviting... the flames call to me.  I 
want to touch them, hold them... how soft they must be... I want 
them to dance in my hands the way they sway and swirl across the 
wood.  I watch for a long time the shimmering incandescence, 
trying to decide how best to capture the mischievous embers and 
hold them in my hand.  That one.  That one is the slowest.  If I 
sneak up on it... very quietly... shhh!  Nobody talk.  
Soundlessly I creep on hands and knees toward the fire... being 
careful not to arouse suspicion in the burning light.  So 
close... just about there... I inch nearer, intending to pounce 
like a cat upon the helpless flame... NOW!

"Shit, Dana, what the fuck are you doing!"  I feel a strong pair 
of arms snag me around the middle just as I begin my assault.

"Let go, Let go... Damn it!"  I fight against the familiar 
embrace of my partner.  "I almost had it!  Almost caught the 
little sucker."

"What are you talking about?" Mulder asks, pulling me away from 
the heat and back to the comfort of our nest of pillows.

"I wanted to catch the fire," I tell him, as he cradles me in a 
protective hug.

"You mean you wanted to catch ON fire, don't you?  Because that's 
what you were about to do."  

Was I?  "And you saved me?"  My hero.  I catch his lips in mine 
and reward him with a kiss for his bravery and going above and 
beyond the call of duty.

~~~~~

This tea is making me nauseous. I try to be polite and drink the 
shit, but I just can't force it down.  When Master Yidah isn't 
looking I dribble the tea on the ground.  I have maybe had a 
total of three sips, and while I can feel a tiny buzz, I know 
Scully is stoned.  This is her second cup of the funky stuff, and 
her eyes are fully dilated, her mouth a little slack.  

Jesus, she just tried to crawl into the fire.  And she doesn't 
know what she did, or how close she came to getting herself 
burned alive... she doesn't know. It's gonna be a tense life on 
this island, if I have to keep on rescuing Scully.  Here I am, a 
nervous wreck, and she is lying in my arms now, decidedly 
amorous, kissing up and down my neck.  Oddly Yidah doesn't seem 
to think this is unusual behavior.  He is still rambling on about 
Kama Sutra, and his little gaggle of girls huddle around him and 
stare soulfully into his eyes.  I wonder how polite I will have 
to be, and get these people booted out so Scully and I can fall 
asleep.  It's bad enough we will have to inhale this sensuous 
shit all night long; by morning we'll severely under the 
influence, which I suspect is right about where Guru-man wants 
us.  

I want this time with Scully, I really do.  I want to explore, to 
experiment and to learn.  I find the Tantra consciousness very 
fascinating, not to mention downright mind-blowingly exciting.  
What we have been learning, by the lessons provided in the 
seminars and by our own study and experimentation... amazing.  
Addictive - and I don't want to stop; can't stop.  I want more. 
But I can't deny I don't trust this Baet-mi guy, certainly not as 
a personal guru and guide.  If our Tantric master was Swami 
Saraswati, I would not have a problem at all, I feel.  I mean, I 
poked fun at his name, but overall I liked him and I trusted him. 
 But this yokel - shit, I wouldn't be at all surprised to 
discover he's some Mafia-wannabe from the 'old country'.  As much 
as a part of me desires to just let go and jump into the Naked 
Fire, the largest percentage of me wants to find the nearest icy 
lake and plunge in head-first... and clear all this damn smoke 
from my brain.  But until I know for sure what's going on; until 
I have something to show, some proof - I have to play along.  I 
know Scully... she's a "Prove-it-to-Me" kind of woman.

Later in the evening - and apparently the great man realizes we 
need to sleep, because he swiftly gathers up his army and heads 
into another room of the building, wishing us blessed sleep as we 
are dozing off in front of him; impolite as all get-out, but I 
don't care.  Tired... so tired.  More Tagara in the air tonight? 
 At this moment I don't care.  I just want to sleep with my 
woman... and then I want answers.


~~~~~~


CHAPTER 13


This place is not at all what I expected.  Not that I really had 
much in the way of expectations... but I never imagined it would 
be like this.  I guess I thought it would be more of the same 
kind of thing we experienced on Abaco.  But Abaco was the lap of 
luxury compared to Mohona.  There's no electricity, no running 
water, the only communication with the outside world is a 
short-wave radio that, we've been told, students are strictly 
prohibited from accessing.  There's no means of transportation 
off this isle without radioing for it.  Our guide, Manu, was kind 
enough to answer all our questions this morning while he showed 
us to our 'accommodations.'  Home.  Not much more than a thickly 
woven mat with a thatched roof above it, but after last night, 
I'm just glad to be out of that hut.  I don't have a clear 
recollection of exactly what happened, but Mulder tells me I 
tried to throw myself into the fire.  Was it the tea, or that 
sickly sweet smelling smoke wafting from the flames?  Whatever it 
was, I was completely gone last night.  Thank God Mulder had his 
wits about him. 

After our mini tour of the island, Manu brings us to the dining 
room.  Well, what passes for a dining room in this place.  A long 
wooden table covered with fresh fruit and breads, located about 
five hundred yards from the camp in a tea house style building. 
It's the only other structure on the island besides the ones we 
saw when we arrived last night.  There is a propane stove at one 
end of the room and someone, thank God, has made coffee.  There 
is no ceremony to dining apparently.  Everyone seems to be 
helping themselves and sitting quietly in pairs upon the platform 
floor.  I grab a cup of coffee and wait for Mulder as he peruses 
over the selected offerings and finally decides upon a custard 
fruit and a blueberry muffin.  Both of us look around the room 
deciding where to sit.  There is little interaction amongst the 
group.  In fact, the room is strangely silent.  Mulder and I 
exchange wordless glances, then find a spot in one corner of the 
room where we can observe the others.

The coffee is strong but surprisingly good.  As I sip, I study 
our fellow Tantrists, getting a good look for the first time at 
the faces of the people who live on this remote isle, and realize 
immediately that our case has been solved.  I lean over and 
confirm this with my partner.  "Do you know who these people 
are?"

"Uh huh."  He nods but doesn't look happy.  "Guess we should get 
a full head count and report back to Skinner."

Despite the quick resolution of this case, I can't help but feel 
disappointed.  "I suppose so.  Though I was hoping we would get 
to spend some time learning from Master Yidah."

"I'm not sure that's really a good idea.  There's still a few 
things bothering me about all this.  And we're in a seriously 
vulnerable position if the situation should suddenly turn bad."

"Just a few days... for me?"

Reluctantly, he agrees.  Mulder is such a soft touch when it 
comes to doe eyes and a pouty lip.  And I'm not above using 
everything in my feminine arsenal to persuade him to give us a 
little more time here.  It may not be a Club Med, but when I look 
around and see how absorbed in each other these couples appear to 
be, I can't help but want to seek the same thing for Mulder and 
me, regardless of the lack of creature comforts this place 
affords.  Since we've allowed ourselves to become intimately 
involved, I am determined to do whatever can be done to assure a 
successful relationship.  And I really believe Tantra can help us 
in that regard.  It's helped us already.  We wouldn't even be 
together if it wasn't for what we experienced on Abaco.  And it's 
helped me.  I've never felt so free before.  So in touch with 
myself, and my desires.  After thirty-six years trying to be 
Daddy's good little sailor, trying to toe the mark despite the 
rebel hiding in my heart, I've finally jumped ship... Forgive me, 
Ahab, but it's time Starbuck discovered who she really is.

~~~~~~ 

Earlier this morning, when the morning mist still hung over the 
surf, I sat in the sand in the beach, and thought about the 
missing couples.  Five couples still missing; at least I think 
it's five.  I counted thirteen pairs at breakfast this morning; I 
am sure of the identity of at least ten of them.  I tried to 
approach one couple but they appeared horrified when I began to 
talk to them, and a few of the Guru's goons (sorry, mystical 
assistants) intercepted me before I could offer more than a 
'hello' - apparently during the more intensive training phases 
there is little or no interaction between couples.  I don't 
remember anyone mentioning that little fact... I was gently but 
firmly led away, out of the eating complex and back into the main 
hut where Scully was waiting, a puzzled look on her face.  She 
didn't say anything, just raised an eyebrow; I shrugged with a 
grin, and gave her a quick smacking kiss on the back of her neck, 
raising goosebumps and a sweet giggle.

Now the woman Madhu is tending the fire, a Mona Lisa smile on her 
face as she carefully stokes the glowing coals.  Our mats have 
been tidied and extra pillows laid out for our comfort, and a 
simple earthen pot and small mugs sit on a woven straw-grass 
tray.  More funky tea... great.  I eye it warily as I take my 
place next to Scully, and feel her twine her fingers through 
mine. 

Madhu has the fire burning now, but there's still a lot of smoke. 
 Tagara.  It smells the same as that night when we first fed each 
other, and touched with such utter abandonment.  Shit.  As long 
as the drug flows freely in the air, we are subject to its 
effects and the last thing we need is to lose our 
self-preservational wits.  But I can't see a way to avoid it, 
without arousing Master Yoda's suspicions.  Well, I will have to 
do my best... because as I sit next to Scully, holding her hand, 
I see her raise her face to the spiraling smoke, and breath 
deeply as it wisps over her way.  Hell, she's already stoned, and 
it's not even nine o'clock in the morning.  And now she spots the 
tea and breaks into a delighted smile, as she pours a cup and 
sips, under the approving eye of Madhu, who then gives me a look 
as if to say, 'Well - what are you waiting for?'  I look her up 
and down with a lopsided grin, and murmur, "No thanks, I'm trying 
to cut back."  

Madhu offers a light frown, and gestures with a graceful hand, 
pointing to the pot.  "But, yes, you must drink, Saiid... the tea 
is most important to your spiritual nourishment.  It is vital to 
your tantric instruction to be relaxed, and free of the worldly 
woes which can affect the Yin and Yang of Erosha."  Her perfect 
face now sports a perfect little crease right down the middle of 
her perfect forehead - and suddenly I could give a rat's ass.  
But somehow, I sense a possible ally here.  I don't know why - 
maybe there's something in her eyes, deep down where she used to 
reside as a normal girl with normal dreams, once upon a time.  
Whatever it is, I catch a tiny glimpse of it, when I reply gently 
to her politely-veiled order.

"I don't think so, Madhu, thanks just the same.  The tea 
disagrees with my... territorial awareness..."  I nod my head in 
 Scully's direction, then my eyes flicker to the open doorway 
leading into the other room, where our Guru slept last night - 
and I see an answering light of comprehension in Madhu's eyes.  I 
see a tiny nod, and her soft, "As you wish, Saiid", tells me she 
understands.  And I breathe one shallow sigh of relief, careful 
not to suck in any air in the vicinity of the smoke... and sink 
down deeper into the pillows, and cradle Scully close to me.  
Close... cherished.  I cherish her - and I am not gonna let 
anything happen to her.  We sit, and wait for the Guru Master 
Baet-mi to appear, to begin our first series of lessons.  


~~~~~~


"...All these practices, if lightly performed, arouse desire and 
provoke sighs, which are born of pleasure caused by pain, 
especially when they take place in those parts of the body that 
are not very accessible... the most sensitive and excitable 
receptors of the sexual self."

Oh God... The voice of Master Yidah is the first thing I'm 
cognizant of, even before my eyes are opened, his deep voice 
penetrates the dark cocoon of intoxication that has enveloped me. 

"...More than just accepted, Fox.  It is encouraged.  In 
moderation, to excite and titillate, to open the Chakras.  Along 
with oral congress, these methods are quite successful in the 
Awakening process."

"Mmmm..." Finding myself cradled in Mulder's arms, my face buried 
against the warm skin of his neck, I can't help a purr of 
contentment.  I breathe in the familiar scent of his body, and 
fight my way out of the Tagara haze inside my head. 

"Speaking of awakening.  Morning again, Sunshine.  Or should I 
say afternoon?"

"I'm sorry," I yawn.  "Oh... boy, I must have dozed off."

"I think your little jaunt on the beach tired you out."

For a moment I can't remember, and then slowly, vague images, 
like distant memories, collect themselves in my thoughts.  The 
ocean... me running... Mulder chasing me.  Oh, God.  Me running 
naked on the beach... Oh, dear God!  I thought I was the wind.  I 
know that I'm literally blushing from head to toe because I can 
feel the heat washing over me.

"Dana, my child, you should not be troubled by your actions.  A 
state of transcendent consciousness is a part of the process of 
self discovery, allowing your passions to have free reign is how 
one attains the ecstasy of the inner being, and through this the 
Chakras blossom, the petals unfold, the secrets of the universe 
are revealed."

I nod at Master Yidah's lesson, but I'm still mortified by my 
shameful lack of modesty, and complete loss of inhibition.  And I 
note that Mulder has been using his body to shield me from any 
more of the intoxicating smoke of the ritual fire.  I feel guilty 
that he has to look after me, but grateful that I know I can 
count on him to protect me even from myself when the occasion 
arises.  

"I feel I must apologize, Master Yidah.  The Tagara... it affects 
me to the extreme."

"That means you are a good candidate for Aushadhi, the herbal 
Awakening.  We can explore this in future lessons, Dana."

Mulder's grip tightens a little at my waist.  I don't know what 
he fears in this man.  Master Yidah's blue eyes hold nothing but 
gentle peace as I look in them now, and he offers me a warm 
smile.  He's very disarming.  And I find myself caught up in his 
presence whenever he is near.  I don't know how much of it's due 
to mere physical attraction, the Guru is definitely handsome, but 
there's something else, something captivating about him, 
something almost entrancing.

~~~~~~


Aushadhi, my ass... not if I have anything to do about it.  We've 
only been here two days, and I am becoming more and more worried 
about Scully.  It was bad enough yesterday, when she tried to 
climb into the fire.  I have never been more frightened, when I 
looked up and saw her crawling on her hands and knees toward the 
flames as if they were a litter of playful kittens and she had 
the only ball of yarn.  I yanked her back mere inches from the 
licking flames - and broke out into the worst kind of panicked 
sweat, when I realized just how few inches it really was.  

This morning, however... Jesus.  If I'd stayed inside the hut one 
more minute, Scully would not be alive right now - of that I 
remain convinced.  

I should have known  - should have just followed her.  We'd gone 
into the main hut to prepare for our first session with Guru 
Yoda, finding the customary Tagara wafting across our noses and 
the ever-present tea.  I refused to drink it, but Scully had two 
cups of the greenish shit.  Not only that, she breathed in the 
Tagara like no tomorrow.  In the ten minutes it took for Yoda to 
appear, she had become so overwhelmingly wasted, so quickly... 
and at first I humored her, amused by her antics.  She had 
dropped her robe with a slightly shaky hand, and had begun to 
slink on her hands and knees toward me.  Thank God this time, she 
skirted around the fire instead of traipsing through it.  She 
came to me with a look which I can only describe as smoldering - 
 eyes half-shielded by her thick lashes, blackly dilated; cheeks 
so hotly flushed and lips wearing a half-smile of pure lust.  

I couldn't move, could barely breathe, as she got closer, and 
closer. .. and just as she got within reach, even as I grabbed 
hold of her, feeling how hot her skin had become - she suddenly 
laughed aloud, and slithered out of my grip, murmuring 
breathlessly, "Swimming... let's go swimming, Mulder - I want to 
fuck you, in the ocean..."  Then she was up on her feet and 
running out of the hut and down the beach, naked and wild and 
free... too free.  I sat there for a few minutes, still bemused 
by her abruptly bizarre behavior - until I remembered what 
happens to inebriated and incapacitated people who try to tackle 
swimming.  I was up on my feet and running after her, yelling her 
name... just in time to see her run straight into the surf, and 
disappear under a rolling breaker.  

My heart pounding in indescribable panic, I ran as hard as I 
could, managing to reach her before she could go under a second 
time.  I dragged her clear of the crashing surf and threw her 
over my shoulder, struggling up out of the wet, sucking sand and 
carrying her back to the main hut.  She giggled against my 
shoulder, all the way back - and after I had taken her back to 
the fire and had dried her off with her robe and she began to 
shudder with reaction; after she started crying and hiccuping in 
my arms -I rocked her and murmured to her softly; until, finally 
calming and then almost as if a light had been extinguished - she 
dozed off against my damp chest, about one minute before Guru 
Yoda made his grand appearance.  Amazingly, he didn't seem very 
perturbed by the little incident, even after I politely but 
firmly asked him what the hell he'd been thinking of, to combine 
Tagara with that damn tea.  Of course, the Guru only smiled 
benignly and apologized for unconsciously overdoing the 
atmosphere, not knowing (of course) that Scully was so 
susceptible.   

Right.

Now Scully curls herself within my embrace, so trustingly; 
trusting in me to help her; to keep her from becoming so affected 
by whatever these stupid herbs do to her; natural or not they are 
still potentially-dangerous drugs.  What worries me the most is 
her decreasing concern, every time she comes into contact with 
one of them.  I see her willingness to experiment, to inhale and 
imbue, a little bit more each day... and it's scaring the shit 
out of me.  It's also becoming increasingly difficult for me to 
stay out of the path of the shit, without raising undue 
suspicion.  I mean, I can only depend upon Madhu to cover for me 
as long as it doesn't endanger her position here on the island.  
I would like to find out more about her position, as well - I 
know she is the great Yoda's mate, but I wonder just how much she 
may know, how much she gets to observe beyond having to watch the 
man she loves interact with a harem of lovely women.  Maybe I'll 
find a way to speak to her, later on.

And I am pissed off at myself, for feeling hurt - actually hurt, 
at my logical and irrefutable conclusion that Swami Saraswati had 
to be in on this whole mess from the very beginning - he threw up 
quite an impressive smoke screen on Abaco.  He had me fooled - I 
was feeling sorry for the man, wondering how he'd handle his 
little Tantric world coming down around his ears when he 
discovered the truth about the couples' disappearance.  Now, a 
logical and sane voice yells at me to get real, and accept the 
Swami's implication in this scam.  How could he not be involved? 
 He's one of the Guru's most trusted disciples; Yoda-man told us 
that himself.  Shit.

So, in the meantime I have to figure a way to achieve some sort 
of balance - keep myself clear, try to keep Scully as clear as I 
can as well - and keep Guru Master Baet-mi (the name never ceases 
to make me want to hurl) from suspecting that we are anything 
other than what we appear to be - and what we have actually 
become.

And, I swear- if he endangers her in any way with those damn 
drugs... I am going to make sure he regrets ever draping himself 
in goofy robes and baggy diapers, and calling himself a god.

~~~~~~

CHAPTER 14


After Scully's beach adventure neither of us feels much like a 
lesson; and even though I'm sure the Guru thinks I am 
overreacting, he agrees to let us have the rest of the day to 
ourselves, instructing us to meet him at the main hut in the 
morning to begin in earnest.  Scully's protests being 
non-existent, we leave his "exalted" presence and return to our 
small hut.  By now Scully is dry and warm, and still 
embarrassed... and a little shaky at what just happened to her.  
I sit on our bed-mat with her on my lap, and try to explain what 
happened.

"Scully, you had a major buzz off that damn green tea shit, not 
to mention the Tagara... again.  Jesus, you had your nose 
straight up in the air, inhaling like crazy!  And it took you all 
of seven minutes to become stoked, rip off your robe and take off 
running down the beach, calling to me to come fuck you in the 
surf.  Now I appreciate the offer, believe me -"  I pause and 
give her a series of sweet kisses up and down her neck, enjoying 
her salty skin - " but under safer circumstances!  You had so 
much shit in your system that your capacity for swimming in a 
strong surf would have been non-existent!  Hell, MY capacity 
would have been worthless as well - the surf in this side of the 
island is powerful."  I push her away a little, enough to be able 
to stare into her now worried blue eyes.  I want her to 
understand, past the lingering fog in her brain, just how 
dangerous this is.

"Please, Scully... you have to help me a little.  What if I can't 
be with you in a situation where you soak in that crap, and 
you're alone?  What if we find we can't trust the Guru Yoda, at 
all!  I've already decided I can't trust the little hedonist any 
further than I can toss him - and we are in the middle of an 
investigation, regardless of our new relationship, in spite of 
our need and desire to embrace the Tantra way of life.  You know 
the Guru has to be involved in the disappearance of those 
couples... I counted ten people missing, and then when I really 
got to thinking about it, I realized I had already found five of 
them.  Those women, Scully -"  Her head, resting on my shoulder, 
jerks up at the mention of the women, and she gives me a narrowed 
stare.

"What women, Mulder?  The ones which comprise the Guru's harem?  
Are you trying to tell me those women are the other half of the 
missing couples?  I don't believe that - where are their mates?  
If they were married or committed to a relationship, they'd be 
here with their mates.  You have to be mistaken..."  I'm shaking 
my head vigorously even before she finishes speaking.

"No, Scully.  I may not have my laptop, but I'm NOT mistaken.  I 
remember most of the faces.  I've seen those women before.  Maybe 
my mind has been somewhat fuddled by the damn smoke, and maybe 
I've only seen their faces in partial shadow - but I'm telling 
you, they ARE the missing women.  And we're going to find out 
what happened to their men.  We have a free day - and Manu told 
us we can explore the island as we choose.  I say we choose to 
explore a little, get the smell of that Tagara out of our heads, 
and maybe go play.  Manu mentioned a lagoon - whatcha say, Agent 
Baby?  Wanna go play in the lagoon?"  I'm desperate to get us 
into some kind of normalcy - well, as normal as we can be, 
sitting on a grass mat in the middle of an uncharted island 
wearing bathrobes and eating papaya while a Guru, of some sort, 
plots the course of our love life... Jesus, help us do the right 
thing...  I'm brought out of my little dip in despair by Scully, 
who sighs against my shoulder, and then reaches up a soft mouth 
to kiss me, and whisper in my ear.

"OK, Mulder, you win.  Let's play hooky."  I give her a huge 
squeeze, before rising and pulling her up beside me.

"Last one in has to be a 'slave for a day'..."  She snorts at 
this inane remark, grabbing at my hand and tugging me outside in 
the bright sun.

"Mulder, I'm already there - trust me."


~~~~~~
  
Mulder just can't resist playing G-Man, even though it's obvious 
this case is no case at all.  He's still puzzling over trying to 
ID each of the other couples.  Of course, without his laptop, 
that's virtually impossible... especially as we are not permitted 
free visitation with the other students.  Manu politely explained 
that to us only after Mulder violated the rule and caused quite a 
commotion the other day.  But now he's ever more determined to 
prove his theory that all is not well here on Mohana.  'It's the 
math, Scully, it doesn't add up.' That's what he keeps telling 
me.  And he's relentless about pursuing the point.  He's also 
troubled by the fact that Swami Saraswati apparently lied to the 
authorities when they asked him if he knew the whereabouts of the 
missing couples.  I tried to tell him that the man was probably 
just attempting to protect the privacy of the members of his 
church... God knows he has good cause to fear when you consider 
our government's heavy hand where religious cults are concerned. 
 Not that I'm defending his failure to cooperate in a criminal 
investigation.  He was wrong to do that.  I just think it's easy 
to understand why he may have felt it necessary to lie.  As 
usual, Mulder will not accept the simplest explanation.  I'll 
have no peace, or be able to convince him to trust Master Yidah, 
until he sees that everyone is accounted for.  So tonight I've 
agreed to put aside my studies and humor my partner.  We're going 
to poke around and see if we can find any sort of record keeping 
that would indicate who all these people are.

Waiting until everyone appears to be soundly asleep for the 
night, Mulder and I quietly slip out of our bed... mat... 
whatever... and sneak over to the main hut.  We're assuming that 
the tiny room we saw when we first arrived which contains the 
radio equipment, might be an office of sorts and possibly house 
files on the church membership.  I feel very uneasy about doing 
this.  I don't want to offend Master Yidah should we be 
discovered snooping around.  Unfortunately, Mulder was determined 
to go through with it whether I went along or not, and it IS my 
job to watch his back and keep him out of trouble.  So here we 
are, tiptoeing around in the darkness outside the main hut... 

As we approach, we hear sounds coming from inside. The door is 
slightly ajar and we're able to see into the main room as we did 
when we watched the fire rite the day of our arrival.  Oh my God! 
 My first reaction is to quickly move away, but Mulder is right 
behind me, trapping me where I stand.  And the longer I watch 
what's happening inside the hut, the less inclined I am to want 
to get away.

Master Yidah and his consorts are doing their own version of the 
naked pretzel.  In the glowing light of the fire, one man and 
five women perform the Tantric act of Samghataka, group sex, the 
bull and his herd.  My cheeks flush hot as I watch Master Yidah 
penetrating one woman while he fulfills another with 
Auparishtaka, the act of cunnilingus; and the other women 
alternately kiss and lick him, running their hands in worship 
over his stunningly muscular body.  They are not shy with each 
other either.  With complete abandon they give and take one to 
the next, hedonism in its purest form.  It's quite an erotic 
sight to behold... very arousing.  

"Holy shit," Mulder mutters against my ear.  And I can tell by 
the hardness suddenly pressing into my back that Mulder is as 
affected by this display as I am.  

"We should go," I whisper over my shoulder to him, unable to tear 
my eyes from the goings-on in the Tagara haze.  Leaning back 
against him, I attempt to encourage Mulder away, but he wraps 
both his arms around my middle and holds me firmly in place.  One 
of the women inside cries out, overcome with an orgasm; and I 
gasp as Mulder's hand slips inside my robe to fondle my breasts. 
 Captive and captivated, I find myself lost in the sensuality of 
voyeurism... watching as Master Yidah pleasures each woman in 
turn, watching their oiled and tropical tanned bodies sliding 
over one another in a tangle of heated passion, watching the 
powerful way in which the Guru conquers each... all the while 
Mulder's hand continues to knead my breasts, his fingers rolling 
and pinching my hardened nipples until I swear I'm about to come.

I reach back and take his cock in my hand, slowly running my 
thumb up and down along the length of his shaft.  He groans 
softly and buries his face in my neck, nibbling, nipping, 
kissing... but always continuing to watch the rapturous scene 
before us.  Mulder's other hand soon finds its way beneath my 
robe and wanders down in between my legs, cupping and gently 
massaging the curly mound of damp heat he finds there, causing me 
to squirm and shudder against him.  We shouldn't be here.  We 
shouldn't be doing this.  But there's no way in hell I'm going to 
stop us now.


~~~~~~

Jesus... I'm on fire.  I can't stop, can't move, am almost afraid 
to breathe.  The display of Naked Fire Ritual we watched last 
night is innocence personified, compared to what Scully and I are 
seeing at the moment.  True, we stumbled upon the sight purely by 
chance... true, we should not be lingering here, watching.  

Just as true that I can't, won't stop - not as long as I am 
buried in Scully, so deep the place where my fingers are curling, 
so slick and deep.  She presses into me, her little bottom 
sliding on the silk of her robe; the slippery friction compounded 
by the feel of her hand tugging and stroking at me.  Driving me 
mad... pulling at me, at the fine edge of control, of sanity I 
hang onto, as we stare unblinkingly into the scene unfolding 
before our stunned eyes.

We never meant to actually go back into the main section of the 
hut at this late hour - I knew the Guru sleeps with his 
assistants watching over him. That first night I had awoken very 
early in the morning, before sunrise; had opened my eyes and 
gazed groggily into the face of one of the assistants standing in 
front of the makeshift door to the Guru's private domain.  He had 
inclined his head in polite deference, and then continued to 
stare out into the shadowed room, focused on nothing in 
particular.  I'd shrugged and gone back to sleep.  So the Guru 
needs his goons to sleep safely at night... whatever tickles his 
turban.

We just wanted to check out the tiny room which we suspect holds 
the records, and radio - accessible from the outside without 
having to disturb the main rooms, we figured it was an easy go.  
We never expected the fire room to be occupied... and we never 
expected quite this level of occupation.  We were caught in its 
lure same as a deer gets caught in the headlights of a Mack 
truck:  dazed, shocked, immovable, and doomed.

Yes, we are doomed, so... we watch.  Watch as Guru Superstud 
Yidah slithers his way over his five slave-women; his five 
captive slave-women - trapped in the haze of Tagara and probably 
high as kites on tea as well, I concede they have no choice in 
the matter.  A humming sound, coming from a shadowed corner of 
the room; I squint hard, and am able to make out the form of 
Madhu, sitting in a lotus position in the corner, head bowed and 
hands in an attitude of prayer, humming some sort of chant.  I 
stare at her just long enough to see her raise her head, maybe 
some prickling of awareness in her consciousness has alerted her 
to our presence; but she doesn't move, save raising her head and 
staring into the fire, long enough for me to see the glisten of 
tears tracking down her cheeks.  And a tiny section of my 
still-functioning brain tells me to find a way to talk to her, 
very soon - even as the blitzed majority of cranium cells scream 
at me to pay attention to the show.

The show... God help us.  Five women, pleasuring the Guru in ways 
I have never even read about... he has moved to stand in front of 
a woman on her knees, hands fisted in her hair as she engulfs him 
in her mouth and begins the ritual of Auparishtaka, or fellatio. 
 I have never seen it performed in quite this way, however - even 
from this short distance I can see that she has somehow managed 
to swallow not only his entire cock, but his balls as well.  The 
length of him, deep in her throat and his balls rolling around 
the inside of her cheeks...  I'm panting, I can hear myself - and 
Scully grips me harder, now pumping her hand upon me with 
increased speed.  I want to prolong this forever; want to see 
everything, feel everything - so I gently remove her hand from my 
cock and twine my fingers with hers, bringing our joined hands to 
her dripping center, and slip one of her fingers and one of mine 
inside her.  She sucks in a shocked breath, as she adjusts to 
having her fingers buried alongside of mine... and she melts back 
against me as we watch, and caress her clit in perfect matched 
rhythm.   

Now the Guru, still being pleasured by the Amazing Deep Throat 
woman, is joined by another of the women; in her hands she holds 
a double-headed dildo.  I have seen these before, although I will 
never admit it to Scully; this one is long and wickedly-curved, 
glistening on one end with oil of some kind.  She approaches 
Stud-boy from behind with the oiled end towards him, and presses 
it up against his cheeks, murmuring a chant over and over; he 
takes a small step to the side to open his stance a bit as she 
slides the appendage home.  Once it's in place, she raises 
herself up on her toes, wraps her arms about his shoulders as if 
she's going for a piggy-back ride... and the other end of the 
dildo slips into her.  And as she begins to wriggle against him, 
hung there upon his back, I hear Scully  whimpering, "Oh, Jesus, 
Mulder...", as both Guru and slave push and thrust; as his hands 
tighten in the hair of the woman going way down on him, and as 
the other three women form a triangle of seeking hands and mouths 
and bodies, all around his feet.  

He's still standing... but Scully and I have slid to the floor 
outside the doorway; both of us struggling to maintain intimate 
contact without screaming like banshees into the air above us.  
On our knees, still watching... my cock pressed against her sweet 
cheeks and an arm braced on the floor.  Without conscious 
thought, I find myself in one of my favorite positions - yes, I 
am a dominant oink when it comes to sex, but I can't help that, 
any more than I can help the hard shudder which overtakes me as I 
suddenly position myself behind Scully, bend her forward until 
her forehead almost kisses the floor... and then plunge the 
largest, hardest and most throbbing boner of my entire life, deep 
into her; my ramming thrust forcing a huge gasping breath from 
her throat as her head jerks up against my shoulder, neck arched. 
 She braces her free hand against the floor, somehow managing to 
keep her balance contained, as well as the scream which I know 
has to be bubbling up in her lungs - but she doesn't stop 
pressing back into me, trying to take in more of me. She feels so 
fucking amazing, in this position - I can thrust hard without 
fear of hurting her for she is absolutely dripping, over both our 
hands which are still playing with frenzied glee over the tight 
bud of her clit.

With the tiny section of my brain which isn't on major sensory 
overload, I wonder if she's still watching.  I want her to watch, 
to take it all in just as she takes all of me inside.  I want her 
to feel what those women must be feeling, coiled around and 
through each other, as they lay in a heap of slick flesh all 
around their master.  

I can tell she hasn't been taken in this position very much, if 
at all; her movements are unschooled and erratic, which only 
feeds my excitement all the more - because I know I am one of the 
first to take her like this.  And as we push at each other, back 
and forth, as I butt my face into her neck and gasp every shudder 
into her skin, she starts to moan - and I have to shut her up in 
a hurry.   I don't want the Guru to know what's going on just a 
few yards from his little orgy - I don't want to share.  So I 
press my face tight against her ear, and growl into her as I push 
myself even deeper, as deep as I can go.

"Better be quiet, Scully.  You don't want them to hear us, do 
you?  Never know how they may react... Jesus, right there, don't 
move... I can imagine what they might do, Mmmm... can you?  They 
might force us to join them... Ohh, shit, hold still... Tangled 
up with all those hot, oiled bodies, hands, tongues, all over 
you..."  She's whimpering, raw and low in her throat, as I 
continue to paint the images and brand both of us with them.  I 
speed up the force of my thrusts as I continue.

"No, Scully, keep your mouth shut... or else Guru Yodel will find 
something to stuff it with - and I don't wanna share you, baby, I 
don't... Don't turn away!" - for she's trying to duck her head, 
moaning almost constantly under her breath, as I force her to 
watch, force her to touch and rub at herself while I plunder her, 
an unseen force behind her while the display before her dances in 
our eyes like some wet-dream ballet.  I don't let up on her; I 
can feel how close she is, how close we both are, and I want her 
to come her brains out, as I know I'm going to do - soon, so 
soon.

"Keep watching, baby, look at him, with those women - he doesn't 
mess around when he fucks a woman.  What if he forces me to share 
you - what if he makes me take you while he's got that pretty 
mouth of yours all busied up... could you imagine it, baby?  Both 
of us, inside you, filling you..."  And with those words, I let 
go of her hand, still pressed into her clit, and grasp her hips 
with hard fingers as I pull her sharply up, into my exploding 
cock; she hitches a sobbing breath into the air, gearing up to be 
the granddaddy of all come-screams... I manage to muffle her with 
a hand against her mouth... Jesus, so good... such a turn-on, to 
know I have to forcefully gag her -

And I have a feeling the Guru knows just what's going on outside 
his door; have a feeling he set us up... then I can't spare one 
extra blood cell to think of anything else besides the fact that 
I am coming that geyser I often dream about. 

~~~~~~

CHAPTER 15


I have no idea what time it is, but there is not yet even a hint 
of dawn on the horizon and the moon is hidden behind clouds, 
making for a pitch dark night as I awaken in Mulder's embrace, on 
the grass mat of our island shelter.  He's wrapped around me, my 
head pillowed on his arm, in a wonderful bearhug of protection 
and love.  This man who has delivered me from my life of denial, 
from a lonely prescribed existence of failed obedience and 
ambitious   pretense.  Mulder released me from my self-imposed 
hell, taught me to trust myself, to accept the most extreme 
possibility of all... that I could stop running away from who I 
really am without fear of judgment or rejection.  I've shown him 
who I am, the real me hidden beneath the practiced, polished, 
disciplined conformity, and... he loves me.  Such a wonder.  To 
think that for years I sought to be what I thought he wanted me 
to be, only to discover that who I am... really am, is what he's 
been looking for all along. 

My hidden desires can now be expressed and fulfilled.  I feel as 
though my life has finally just begun.  And what a wonderful 
beginning, cradled in the arms of the man who has given me this 
life, this rebirth.

The shocking performance we witnessed in the Guru's hut tonight 
would have sent the old Dana Scully running for cover, hiding 
behind a mask of no nonsense propriety and feigned composure... 
denying even to herself the arousal she felt at seeing that kind 
of wanton sexual display.  She would have fled from herself just 
as quickly as she fled from the scene, refusing to admit that it 
touched her in ways that provoked her own forbidden fantasies.  
She would never have allowed herself the indulgence of watching, 
let alone the outrageous behavior of giving in to her passions 
and letting her partner fuck the living daylights out of her 
right then and there.

It was incredible.  So completely spontaneous and reckless, 
submitting to our basest instinctual behaviors, letting ourselves 
be guided by lust and ruled by the heat of the moment.  Mulder's 
aggressiveness once again had me aroused beyond sanity.  When he 
bent me forward and pierced me with that rod of hot iron... God! 
 I've never trusted another man enough to let him take me that 
way.  To allow myself to be put into a position of vulnerability, 
where I could not see the face of the man taking me.  

The men I've been with in the past, the experiences I've had, 
they were all quite boring and normal.  Jack wasn't the first but 
he was the most significant.  He wasn't much of a lover.  He was 
too self-absorbed, he never attempted to get to know me and my 
needs.  Or maybe I wouldn't let him know me.  That's not what we 
were about, Jack and I.  He would have been shocked if he saw the 
way I behaved tonight, stunned that Mulder's menacing words would 
incite me to such a state of frenzied eroticism.  Jack would 
never have approved of my hidden need for dominance.  Or any of 
my dark fantasies that Mulder so graciously indulges.  That's why 
I chose him.  He was the man I was supposed to want, the 
achiever, the straight-laced do-gooder, the man my father would 
have accepted as a suitable husband for his over-achiever 
daughter, the man all of my friends expected me to marry.  

We dated for close to six months before we even did it.  God, it 
was awful.  I'd fake it for him, and I hated myself for not 
having the courage to tell him that in our entire fifteen month 
relationship I never once had an orgasm.  Until that night, when 
I just couldn't take it anymore.  Our sex had become routine, 
every Friday and Saturday night, never during the work week, 
never anywhere but in the dark of his bedroom or mine.  I could 
watch the clock, and I did, always the same, seven minutes... and 
right on cue I would moan, put on a little performance that led 
him to believe I had climaxed, and that would push him over the 
edge and the whole miserable thing would be done with.  But one 
night I couldn't play the game anymore.  He got really frustrated 
and blamed me for not trying hard enough, said some very hurtful 
things to me.  So I told him the truth.  He called me frigid.  I 
wonder if Mulder knows where the nickname Ice Queen really came 
from?  Jack was kind enough to spread nasty rumors after our 
break up.  And I forgave him because I knew I'd bruised his ego 
and, at the time, I wasn't entirely sure that the things he was 
saying about me, while cruel, were necessarily untrue.

I dated a little, after Jack, mostly before I met Mulder.  There 
was one or two that I gave in and slept with... and I did have 
orgasms; I found I was capable when the man was motivated.  But 
none of those men could do to me what Mulder does.  None of them 
could bring me to the point of screaming ecstasy.  Just thinking 
of what he does to me has me suddenly wet and needing him again. 
 I shift a little in his arms and he mumbles something in his 
sleep.  Careful not to wake him, I slip my hand beneath his robe 
and find the rigid length of his erection waiting for me.  Can't 
help but smile at my good fortune.  He must be dreaming, maybe 
revisiting the scene in Master Yidah's hut.    

~~~~~~

Early morning on the beach - and I am sore and tired and so, so 
alive.  I stand at the edge of our shelter, taking in the 
mistiness of the sunrise and the sure knowledge that whatever 
else happens to Scully and me, we have had this time together.  
Behind me on our bed-mat Scully sleeps like one of the dead, a 
delicate sprawl of rosy skin and golden freckles and flaming 
hair.  She woke me in the middle of the night; really surprised 
me since I didn't think she'd had anything left.  Boy, was I 
wrong...  I awoke in the inky darkness with Scully sitting on my 
cock like such a proper little lady... and I was buried to the 
hilt.  In the thick black she was invisible; I could only feel 
her, tight and hot all around me; could smell her and taste her 
as she rode me as easily as a child rides a rocking horse, soft 
and slow and sexy as hell.  Her fingers tangled themselves in our 
combined hair as she moved; one hand toying with my balls while 
the other frolicked along her reddish curls.  Damn... what a way 
to wake up!

Recalling the endless, slow-burn orgasm she had just a few hours 
ago - I let her sleep, knowing she will need all the rest she can 
get; besides, as I spot a lone figure sitting on the sand, in 
graceful meditation... I know here is my chance to finally speak 
to Madhu, before anyone else is up and around - and interfering. 
 Tossing a quick glance to the seemingly deserted main hut, I 
trot down to the beach, prepared to get those answers one way or 
another.

"Good morning, Madhu - did you sleep well?"  Oh, shit - what a 
thing to say!  Of course she didn't, you asshole - she probably 
slept alone all night long, crying into one of those damn grass 
mats that we all try to convince ourselves are really not all 
that uncomfortable.  After what she'd had to endure, last night - 
I can only imagine what she must be feeling, must feel every time 
her jerkwad Guru Masterbaetmi pulls an orgy on her. 

But Madhu has a smile to spare for me, as I sit in the sand next 
to her; eyes smiling as well, despite the dark circles beneath 
them.  A little pale, cold hands, slight tremble of the bottom 
lip.  This morning she has her sarong wrapped at breast level 
instead of its customary placement at her waist.  I can't help 
but wonder if it's an unconscious plea for control, over some 
tiny slice of her non-existent life.

"Saiid Hale... Good morning to you.  Are you finding the 
fulfillment for which you have been searching, here on Mohona?  I 
sincerely hope you have..."  Madhu smiles at me, affording me a 
sweet glimpse of the beauty we saw that first day we arrived.  
She breaks my gaze, and her eyes seek the pounding morning surf, 
slender fingers worrying the fringed hem of her sarong - until I 
reach out one hand and still their erratic movements.  I clasp 
her cold fingers, and she lets me hold them, but won't turn to 
meet my curious gaze.  I get the odd feeling that if I am allowed 
to really look, deep into her eyes... I'll see a very old, very 
defeated woman, looking back at me, although this woman is 
younger than me; younger than Scully.

"Madhu," I say her name softly, non-threateningly, just loud 
enough to get her attention.  She sighs and turns from her 
contemplation of the aqua water, and her eyes finally meet mine - 
and the weariness I see there pulls at me.  "Madhu, leave him... 
just go.  Get off this island and find a life for yourself; a 
life you deserve.  Please, before it's too late and you find 
yourself too dependent upon him..." Her sad smile halts my rushed 
plea, and she squeezes my hand once before she tugs hers free.

"I have no place to go, Saiid, and no one to go to.  My family 
are all dead; I was an orphan, living in Pakistan, when the 
Master found me.  He saved me from a life of starvation, a life 
on the streets... I owe him much.  I embraced his religion, his 
way of life, as a debt of gratitude for giving me back my life." 
 She rests her little chin on her bent knees, and stares out once 
more at the boiling surf, longingly.  I get the distinct feeling 
that at the moment she'd like nothing better than to toss herself 
on those rolling waves, and end it all.  The feeling is so strong 
that I actually grab at her arm; she emits one short, bitter 
tinkling laugh, and gently pulls her arm free.  "Saiid... I 
promise you I would not do away with myself; I am not that brave. 
 If I were a brave person I would have left this life, though you 
will never hear me admit it again."

"But, let me ask you something - why do you and your lady stay, 
when it is apparent to me that you do not wish to be here?  I 
believe you are sincere in your desire to embrace the Tantric 
dynamic... as sincere as your wish for the teacher of your souls 
to be anyone except my husband."  My rueful smile slips out 
before I can control my shocked reaction to her words - and I 
know she's spotted the surprise as well.  Her next words confirm 
it.

"Oh, I know... I know what you think.  And I also know you are 
worried about your lovely wife.  And I will tell you this, though 
I will deny it should the words ever return to haunt me - you 
have reason to worry.  The master my husband has never possessed 
a woman with red hair; it has been a fantasy of his, to have such 
as she in his harem.  I am not a blind woman, nor am I stupid.  
Foolish, yes - because I stay.  But stupid?  Oh, no."  With those 
words, she rises to her feet, as graceful as a swan; holds out 
her hand to me and presses her palm to mine, before touching her 
forehead, and then her breast, with two fingers.  But before she 
can turn to leave, I spring to my feet and grab at her hand; tug 
on it sharply.  She turns to face me, and suddenly we are 
standing very close, almost nose to nose, and I speak in urgent 
whispers to her, my eyes never leaving her face.

 "Madhu... come with us when we leave.  I have to get Dana off 
this island before anything... disturbing... can happen to her.  
Please, Madhu!  Come with us...  You can have a normal life; we 
can help you.  Please!  Think about it - we need your help, and I 
believe you need ours.  Will you just think about it?"  Madhu's 
shoulders, stiffened at first, have gradually softened as I speak 
to her, plead with her.  Until she softens completely, and taking 
one step forward she leans in to press her soft cheek against 
both of mine, in a gesture as European as it is sweet, and a 
little sad.   As she turns away toward the surf, her reply drifts 
back to me.

"I will think about it, Saiid - I promise you I will think about 
it."

~~~~~

When I awoke this morning I was alone.  I thought that perhaps 
Mulder had decided to go for a run on the beach, or maybe a swim 
in the lagoon, but I didn't have to search very far or very long 
before I saw him, sitting there with Madhu on the beach... 
holding hands.  I tried not to let my petty jealousies get the 
better of me, but then she stood to leave and he pulled her 
back... pulled her so close to him that their bodies were 
practically touching... and she kissed him on the cheek, on both 
cheeks.  That was enough for me.  

Old habits die hard, I suppose.  Running away, denying my 
feelings, burying my pain deep in a place where I don't have to 
deal with it... much.  I went with the familiar path in time of 
crisis.  An inward retreat.  The strangest thing though, I found 
myself at the main hut.  Rather than seeking my morning coffee, I 
felt the need to imbibe in a cup of the Guru's special tea.  
Something I have discovered flows freely on Mohona, one need only 
make the journey to the sacred fire, kneel in meditation, and the 
offering will be made by the one tending the flames.

Manu is the chosen caretaker this day, and as I enter the hut, 
his welcoming smile greets me, and I return the friendly gesture 
before joining several others already in meditation, a morning 
ritual that many find peace in.  I kneel at the fire, being 
careful to stay clear of the smoke.  I've learned the combination 
of Tagara and tea to be a bit more than I can handle.  

The tea is poured almost immediately, and I'm a little frightened 
by how much I suddenly need to taste it.  My hands are actually 
trembling as I bring the cup to my lips and drink.  I'm well 
aware of what this could mean.  However, this morning, in my 
apathy, I choose to ignore the obvious warning signs, and indulge 
in addiction.  Maybe it's not the wisest thing to do, but I seek 
the contentment of the herbal brew to ease my insecurities and 
soothe my troubled heart.  

Upon finishing my third cup, Manu approaches and hands me a small 
stack of teaching manuals.  "Master Yidah has asked that I give 
you these.  You and your husband should study them before this 
afternoon's lesson."

I nod and accept the booklets from him not even bothering to 
glance at the titles as I prepare myself to leave.

"The Master is very pleased with your progress thus far..." Manu 
continues as I stand and return my tea cup to the serving tray.  
"He is encouraged by the way YOU in particular, have embraced the 
teachings, Dana.  He thinks you would benefit from private 
instruction."

Some of the other church members look up at me at Manu's words.  
I can't read their expressions, but it seems as though I am 
suddenly a curiosity worthy of disturbing even transcendental 
reflection.

~~~~~~


CHAPTER 16


The sun is getting higher in the midday sky, and I haven't found 
anything significant yet.  I am working my way through a 
partially-cleared section of thick underbrush; looks as if 
someone may have cut down the heavy stuff maybe a month ago. An 
all-terrain vehicle could push its way through, I suppose... I 
look down at the ground closely, noting the faint marks in the 
fine sand which is interspersed with thin low grass.  Flattened, 
thin low grass - hmmm.  I get down on my knees, closer to the 
tracks; they appear to be treads.  I squint a bit; so bright out 
here... damn, I was right. An all-terrain vehicle.  Somewhere on 
this island is an all-terrain vehicle; a four-wheeler, I think.  
On an island where there isn't even running water; where there is 
no electricity or sewer system or even solid walls, there is 
gasoline and a four-wheeler.  If there is gasoline, maybe there's 
a generator... maybe a better radio system than what I'd first 
pictured.  I straighten up, wiping the back of my neck, and 
continue exploring.

Scully was upset when I told her I wanted to do some in-depth 
snooping; she'd brought a small stack of thin manuals into our 
sleep area, apparently borrowed from either Manu or the Big Guy 
himself.  She had wanted to read through them with me but I was 
restless, and not a little guilty, for I'd really let this 
investigation slip.  I'd let the need to embrace the Tantra 
override the main purpose of this time on Mohona.  Don't get me 
wrong, it's been amazing.  I have loved exploring the darker as 
well as the passionate side of our love, and in this discovery I 
have found what I have always needed, have always craved.  That I 
should find it with Scully makes it all the more miraculous.  But 
there is still danger here; there are still missing and/or 
presumed dead people, not to mention the fact that five women 
from the original student group seem to be missing their men.  We 
need to solve this; only then can we really have the freedom to 
continue our studies and pursue our own Tantra.  And I want that, 
I really do.

I smiled at Scully as she plopped herself down next to me on our 
mat, and held up the manuals; fascinating topics such as "Erosha 
and Erosflow in Erotic Massage",and "Asanas of Erotic Love" - fun 
stuff, but I had other things on my mind, for once.  I flipped 
through the little books, and regarded her quizzically, noting 
the high flush to her cheeks and the too-bright sparkle in her 
eyes.  Too bright... I couldn't help but wonder what she'd been 
inhaling.  What she'd possibly been drinking... only one sure way 
to find out.  I dumped the manuals on the floor, grabbed her and 
swung her underneath me, sniffing her neck and her hair for 
traces of Tagara smoke; making her giggle and squirm as she 
sputtered, "Mulder, what's gotten into you?  Let go!  We need to 
get these read before our next session -"  I ignored her 
protests, and fastened my mouth on hers, kissing her deeply - and 
tasting tea on her tongue.  And as abruptly as I'd begun with 
her, I stopped - and shoved her away - suddenly angry, worried 
and fed up.  With the drugs, and the manuals, the scratchy mats, 
the overabundance of fruit and the undersupply of meat; the humid 
air and Guru Yodel and all of it. 

Just fed up - and wanting more than ever to get out there and get 
this damn case solved so Scully and I could get back to 
civilization, and our normal FBI lives.  God, I can't believe I 
could actually find myself at a point in my existence when Fed 
life could seem more appealing than an island paradise!  Go 
figure.  Time to get back to as normal as we could; more than 
time enough, I thought, as I grabbed Scully's arms and turned her 
to face me.

"Scully... the investigation, remember?  The reason we came here 
in the first place?  We need to do some investigating, you and I. 
 We've put so much of it aside these past few days, and it's been 
the best thing that has ever happened to me... but we have to 
continue the case, so that we can get this solved and get back to 
DC and the real world!"  I stared hard into her eyes as I spoke, 
seeing with a sinking despair the dark dilation there; realizing 
that in the days since we have been on Mohona her eyes have been 
dilated almost constantly.  And I suddenly couldn't take it 
anymore; I want the Tantra but no more goddamn drugs.  There has 
to be a midway point... there has to be an area of agreement for 
us. I held Scully's gaze, and shook her lightly by the shoulders, 
to emphasize my point.  She looked puzzled, her smile fading as 
she absorbed my words.

"Mulder, you know the case has been solved... we saw the couples, 
in the gathering hut, that first morning we spent here!  You said 
yourself you recognized them - they're studying here, of their 
own free will, same as we are.  The case is solved, Mulder - all 
we have to do is radio for Skinner and let him know, maybe get 
hold of some paper and write up our final report, send it out.  
Then we can concentrate fully on our lessons, and solidify our 
commitment to the Tantra and to each other."  Sincerity in her 
voice... sincerity in her eyes.  Shit.  I didn't know what to 
do... so torn.  I finally took a deep breath, and set her aside 
gently; stood up and glanced down at her curled up on the mat 
with her manuals.  

"Scully, I'm going to go out and get started.  I'm going to 
search every inch of this island, and I would like it if you 
would help me... I really would.  But I am not gonna force you.  
If you want me you know where to find me..."

~~~~~~

He sent for me.  Master Yidah.  I have been called to his 
quarters by Manu, and though I told Mulder I was going to spend 
the rest of the morning meditating and reading, how could I 
refuse his invitation?  Besides, Mulder will be gone for hours, 
he's determined to investigate every last inch of this island, 
and that's just fine with me.  Our Guru was right about Mulder 
when he expressed concerns about his restlessness.  As much as my 
partner tries to embrace the Tantric ways, a part of him still 
can't let go of what we left back in DC.  That troubles me.  I 
want this for us, because after all we've been through, after all 
the horrors both of us have suffered over the years, it's a 
chance to heal, to forgive ourselves, to find inner peace, and a 
closeness beyond anything we've ever imagined.  I'm ready for 
that now.  I want it more than I've ever wanted anything in my 
life.  Mulder and I have a chance to create the perfect 
relationship, based on love and respect, on trust and faith, on a 
friendship that's taken years to build.   

As I enter Master Yidah's hut, Madhu greets me at the door.  I'm 
beginning to think this woman took a vow of nudity as part of her 
Tantric conversion.  A one piece bikini and a collection of 
silver chains worn around her neck and waist is deemed adequate 
for receiving company, apparently.  "Welcome, Dana."  She takes 
my hand and her soft fingers gently caress mine as she speaks.  I 
can't help but note again the sadness this beautiful young woman 
projects.  Is that what Mulder sees in her?  Is his overriding 
need to comfort troubled souls what's drawing him to her?  Or is 
it something less altruistic... something to do with the fact 
that Madhu has the kind of body and face men would willingly die 
for.  

"My husband is waiting to receive you.  Please... follow me."  
Without another word, she leads me into the back part of the hut, 
into the Guru's private quarters.  

The windowless room is dimly lit with candles and smells strongly 
of sandalwood.  Madhu's husband meditates on a featherbed of 
pillows in the center of the room, his courtesans faithfully 
kneeling in a semicircle around him.  When he hears us enter, his 
eyes slowly open.  "Leave us," he orders, and a few moments later 
the door is closed and only Master Yidah and I remain in the 
room.

"Sit with me."  It's a gentle command given as he gestures to the 
pillows directly in front of him.  Those damn eyes of his draw me 
in, and before I even realize what I've done, I'm kneeling only 
an arms length away from him on the soft cushions.

"Your dedication does not go unnoticed, Dana.  In just these few 
days I have seen amazing spiritual growth in you.  You have 
embraced the teachings and are ready to fully immerse yourself in 
the ways of Tantra.  As your Guru, I can give you Awakening, but 
it will only be after years of study that you will you find 
yourself capable of holding on to such enlightenment.  Are you 
willing to devote yourself to attaining this goal?"

"Yes," I tell him honestly.  I've never seen eyes so crystalline 
blue.  Their translucence draws me in, further and further into 
bottomless depths of bright color. 

"That's very good."  The Guru's voice is quiet and soothing.  
"You have already taken the first steps, but it is a long road 
ahead.  Are you prepared to make the journey?"

"I believe so, Master Yidah."  It's as much a battle as I have 
ever fought to tear myself away from his bewitching gaze.

"You must of course prove your devotion.  Give up all your 
worldly possessions.  Abandon materialism.  The spiritual self 
does not require such distractions.  There is no longer any need 
for these things in your life.  The Church will see to all your 
necessities.  Everything which you require on your journey will 
be provided for you.  You need only arrange a donation, a small 
price for spiritual riches beyond imagining."


~~~~~~

(to be continued in Episode 3...)