**al and Legolas**
Lol so i take it he likes skinnydipping!
*~* Dy *~*
*wipes away tears of laughter*
Oh, I am SO annoyed I hadn't found this one before now!!! It is hilarious!
*smacks her own personal Legolas between the eyes with a spoon as he tries to
see what she's reading*
Right...I'll read the rest now...just had to say that!
(La Princesse D'or)
I have been reading this right from the beggining and im only on chapter 10! But
believe me im gonna finish this soon i cant wait to find out what happens! I
just took a look at your reviews and there are hundreds of them and they are so
long, i can never write reviews as long as that! I wish i had read this earlier,
its so brilliant! And funny, its so funny! Why oh why does everyone keep
laughing at legolas? Its mean! And im sick of it, Legolas is my god and i
worship him, plz stop angering him!! Poor elf! He should come live at my house,
i would massage his feet and feed him grapes 24/7! Any i will be back! cya
I'm glad to hear that you are having such a good time in earth. I really love
your story.How was your halloween? Mine was alright, but I live in Canada, and
it was VERY cold, and lots of snow here.
**the_ringspell: Id waez waerm hear for Haelowean. Id wuz a leedle skarie, bud I
em an elf worrier, so I wuz nod afraed. *BOO!* Stoep dat, al!**
Keep him in the tub. I'll be there in 15.... maybe 20 minutes tops... depending
I'll bring the towels. Don't worry.
And... can he do that candy bar trick when I'm there? I'll tie cherry stems with
my tongue if he does the candy bar thing.
I don't have a lustful bone in my body. Honest. Ligaments and muscles, yes.
**IRENA: HEAR I EM, BAYBEE! Com an git me! Brang ur chaerriez, okae? I got da
choklat wid da raepprz on dem, wateing fur u. Im-boi le-se, baybee. Tulya an
OMG, you're so lucky that you saw what you thought you saw!!!
Anyway, Prance, I think you costume was absolutely fetching. I just hope you
didn't have any sugar induced hang overs.
On Halloween I got a scare coz a Black Rider came to my door and asked me if I'd
seen Frodo. I'm sure you could have chased him away for me. >smiles sweetly
**Newmoon: She deed sea whut she thot she saew! I kin taek a loed of shuger, I
hav a hie toelraence. *He better, with all this fangirl drooling going on!* I em
glaed u deed nod let dat Blaek Rieder in ur doar!**
Haha! Okay... Hi Legolas! *waves chocolate* Let's just say you were a bit open
in this chapter. Is that ordinary? I mean, in Middle Earth, you do swim alone do
you? *shudders to think of the entire fellowship bathing together*
**Seaweed: hae Seaweed! *waves Hershey's kisses* We elvz ar nod az enhaebited az
peeple hear on Moedrn-erth seam tu bea, no. Nekkid iz guud!**
LOL, Prance thought he was going to bathe in the commode! What a sight that
would have been, trying to squeeze his lanky, smelly self into the bowl.
Much better image to see him in your hot tub al! And I guess you did see what
you thought you saw. Oh I wish I saw that too! *snicker*
btw, I like Prance's Halloween costume. Very cute.
Hey Prance, I huve meesed u tu! U cin cum to mi houez weeneverr u wunt tu.
Eenytyme! *cough* Now, look what you've gone and done al! I'm talking like
**Nancing Elf: Uze ur emageenashun an u kin sea me tu! *She already did,
Legolas, believe me!* Thaenkz-I em glaed u liked my kostum.**
Nice Halloween costume. That green mohawk makes for one sexy costume. (chuckles
to herself)Type of thing you'd expect to see on the fashion runways. Sort of
Mirkwood 'Prance' meets Billy Idol. You know, combination Wood Elf and Punk
Anarchist. (laughs at her own silliness). Anyway...
Legolas, I'm contemplating sending my husband to archer's school so that he can
learn how to clean our outer garmets without shrinking everything made of wool
and and turning everything white into colorful tie-dyed pinks and purples.
(thoughtful pause) wish I had a hot tub. :)
-Amber aka Stimpy aka Joy aka Pagecko....wow soon I'll have more names then
certain scruffy heirs to the throne of Gondor. :)
**Stimpy: Sumbuddy axed me whoe I whuz at Haelowean, an I sed I am dat aktur dat
plaez Legolas. He muest reely luuk like dis cauze eberrybuddy beeleeved me. U
doe hab almoest as meny naemz as Elessar!**
I was so glad to get my alert saying that this had been updated! What a great
thing to log in and be able to come here to read.
Hi Legolas! Sounds like you're having a lot of fun. I wish someone would come
and live in MY closet. Preferably Faramir or Eomer. Any idea how I can get them
**Sarwolfe Snape: I duenot noe eggsackly hoew I got hear ethur. I due like it
hear at al's houez. Luuk for loetz of updaetz suun!**
*picks up a bow and arrow and points it at author's head* WHERE DID YOU GET THE
CARDBOARD LEGOLAS?!?!?!?!?! WHERE OR ELSE I'LL SHOOT!!!!!!! *calms down
slightly* I do believe that Legolas is a naghty little elf... :) I wonder what
Yes Dear will think of this little inncedent? I can't wait. Did you say that the
hot tub was on the PORCH?!? Not meaning to be sick or anything, but DO YOU KNOW
HOW MANY PEOPLE COULD HAVE SEEN HIM?!?!?!?! Although, sadly enough, many girls
WOULD want to see him. Write more, never quit. Could I borrow him for a day so I
could show him to my friends? I want to see what my one friend's reaction would
be. Hi Legolas! I love you!
**laure: Da hoet tueb iz oudsied on da dek. Ther ar wuudz ael aroun us. De
nayburz liv akross da streat en da frunt yaerd. I lub u tu!**
You don't wanna eat too many of those kisses, Legolas, cos you'll get tooth
decay and have to go to the dentist!!! You don't want that!
About the coming out of the closet thing - slash, Legolas, slash. You don't
wanna read that! It might give you nightmares!
I still say that Cadbury's chocolate is nicer - get Al to go to the store and
buy you some (if they sell it where you are staying)!
Once again, excellent chapter!
ps. Big (real) kisses to you all!
**Magical Rachel: Deantust? I hav pearfek teath! al duz not let me reed slaesh.
She deed led me trie sum Kadberry choklat, an id iz verie guud tu!**
Hi Al, Hi Legolas! Umm, Thranduil says I have to give him the keyboard now, he's
got a few words for his son.... (grin)
Tithen emlin: HOW many times do I have to TELL you, Prances -- err, ahh, excuse
me, PRINCES! -- must always use their best manners, do NOT pull Noldor-like
temper tantrums in other people's houses (Remember what I taught you,
Sindarin=good, Vanyar=even better, Noldor=umm, extremely problematic...) If you
didn't tantrum, you wouldn't smell like a royal Numenorean king-in-exile. Ahem.
And never, but never, forget your towel. What will people think? You were NOT
raised in a barn, little Greenleaf!
*Jasta takes the keyboard back, trying hard not to giggle*
Ahem.... Anyway, I like hot tubs too, Legolas, and when you come over to MY
place, which I hope will be Real Soon Now (tm), you and I will take a nice long
soak together, and your Ada too, who is just the nicest Elf I've ever met since
you yourself. Hugs to you and all the folks at Al's place, don't eat too much
sugar (snicker, giggle!) and tell Al I want a cardboard cut-out stand-up thingie
of you too!!!
**JastaElf: Hae Ada! Hae Jaesta! I deed sae I'm sorree dis like u taut me, Ada,
foar throen da Noldor poewr taentrum. I deed not noe da peeple hear wear soe
enhaebited about not haveen enni klothz on. al sez whin u git da Buukstoer joeb,
u kin git a faek me tu!**
Okay, I'm having serious problems leaving this review. And, no, it's not
ff.net's fault. I'm just being incredibly stupid.
Anyway, how ecstatic was I to see that the much-anticipated chapter 10 in which
Legolas takes a bath was FINALLY posted? Long overdue, but I'm glad it's here.
Totally made my day.
I feel so sorry for YD being surrounded by three people who have mastered the
art of the puppy dog eyes. They are unresistable! He didn't have a chance! Have
I ever told you how much I love Legolas' puppy dog eyes? It just make you want
to give the poor elf a hug, and then a kiss, and then a...ahem, yes, ah...moving
::Snurt:: AL-You thought Legolas peed on the carpet?! I thought you taught him
about the toilet already.
So apparently Legolas going on a power trip is not as sexy as I thought. Pretty
bad aftersmell, huh? Who would have thunk? Oh well, at least it provided a
reason to get that hunka-hunka piece of elf meat naked and in a hottub.
Hey Legolas! Unfortunately I missed out on actually witnessing "The Bath of
Legolas Greenleaf." But I'm glad al wrote about it so we could all enjoy it.
FYI, taking a bath while everyone watches causes excitement only if the one
taking the bath is...uhm...well, to put it plainly--hot. And you, my dear elf,
most definitely fulfill this requirement. You see, it wouldn't be exciting if it
was Gimli in the tub; in fact that would be rather...um...gross. (IMO, anyway; I
don't know, maybe you feel differently). But picture a beautifully smooth and
gorgeously buff (i.e. no overly bulging muscles, no love handles) body
glistening in the water and bubbles and see how excited you get.
How cute-you eat Kit Kat bars the EXACT same way I eat them! I think we're MFEO,
Legolas. How do you eat your Twix's? I eat off the chocolate, then scrap off the
caramel with my teeth, and then go for the cookie.
What do you mean I must have had car trouble? I came and picked you up, didn't
I? ::hits head:: Damn that stupid Legoals! He must have passed himself off as
you again. No wonder he was so smug this past week. Okay, we'll just have to try
it again. We can go to the day spa instead of the salon. They have plenty of
hottubs, and steam rooms too and we can get massages. Okay, I'm coming over
**Puter Patty: I dunnoe whie u an Trea ensis dat al thot I wuld pea on da
karpet. I haeld id ael nite loeng da furst nite in da kloset, remimber? I doent
reely git tu eggisted thankin abot wachin misef take a baf, bud whudever maekz u
haeppie. Whin I eat a Twix, I biet it tu git da choklat to brake off, den I eat
da kooky an karolmal tugeder. I em sorrie Legoalz fuuld u ento thanking he wuz
me. We weel trie agin, okae?**
Hey i love your story. Keep it up. Plese update soon. also i was aondering where
you can get a cardboard cutout of legolas. you can e-mail it me thanks much.
**LegolasGirl666: Thankz fur tipin tu me! al got da faek me at Waldenbuukz. Dere
iz a new won of me an Gimli frum Advanced Graphics. Dere wuz an ad in da LOTR
fain clueb magazeen dat sed trie www.elifesize.com.**
YAY! You finally updated! It was awesome! :)
**Skye Rocket: Deed u git a theasarues yeat? I luuked up awesum in dere, an it
sed maegnifasent meenz da saem as dat tu!**
lol it's different i must say! no screaming fangirls yet thats a plus, keep it
up i like it!
**McDoodle: Whut's a skreemeen faengurl? I em glaed u like my lief stoeree.**
Thank you Legolas, I feel better too. I hope you had fun during halloween. A
little boy dressed up as you came trick or treating at my house! I wonder if all
the other kids noticed that I gave him more candy... Have fun in the hot tub,
but next time you might want to wear a bathing suit... So Yes Dear doesn't get
**Sake: Ar u shur dat de leedle boey at ur doar wuz noet me?! Yeas Deer ez a
purty kool giy.**
(Elvea Aure aka Amanfalathiel)
Hershey's Kisses? OMG how can I possibly refuse that?! Impossible! Don't worry,
I'm fine now. Hershey's always works for me. I'm sorry to hear that you forgot
so much. You forgot a lot of the good things too then! Oh well, I hope you'll
get all those memories back. want to see more of your adventures on this wicked
**Elvea Aure aka Amanfalathiel: Az u kin sea, I em regaening sum of my
meamoriez. I thank id muest bea sumthang majik en da choklat.**
So Greetings to al, YD, Little Pip, and of course Legolas! Sounds like you all
had a fun Halloween! Lots of wonderful chocolate! I can hear PP and NE right
On to the review!
Little Pip sounds like her daddy and mimicks her momma's stances. Amazing what
kids pick up from us and just do it. So Little Pip, you want Legolas to stay in
your room? See, al. She wants a big brother! I can just see the three of you
looking like " a litter of starved Basset Hounds". Pathetic and cute and works
like a charm...well it almost did!
"Come on, Dad, can we keep him?" Sounds like Little Pip is trying to get him to
keep a kitten or puppy! LOL
Dads should know that they cannot resist their little girls. They never can. Not
even if it involves a full grown male Elf from Middle Earth. But YD does manage
to recover his authority quite well. But we all know who rules, don't we Little
And Legolas trying to imitate Pip! LOL
"Yaeh, da baest Daed dere eber wuz!" Tell him Legolas! And jump with all your
It was very nice of you to help Pip straighten her Barbies, Legolas. Nate could
use your help!! Not with Barbies, but with video games and action figures!
al, seriously! Did you really think he peed on the carpet??!! Nah! I knew you
Pip, cat litter won't hurt you. Cat litter is good!
Hmmm...So that is what Elves smell like after a power/tantrum! "I seam tu hav
devaellopd an oeder." Poor Prance...er Prince. IT happens to the best of us. But
Legolas, dear! The toilet??!! What kind of people do you think we are??!! The
waterfall and the lake are the way to go!
"Keeler wellz? Ar doez like Wargs?" Well, hmmm. Interesting comparison, nin
caun. As al said though "very plastic". That is as safe as it gets.
So al, you were being mysterious about those killer glass doors! "Onlee Leedle
Peep seemz tu noe hoew tu deefeet da spael." It certainly took you long enough
to enlighten him.
"Pet tuerdle" LOL
SOunds like he is fascinated by the hot tub, al! Bubbles and all..... still got
that Boromir image, do we??!!
EEP! You only caught a glimpse in the glass doors?? I know several of your
reviewers who would die for just that mere glimpse! LOL but hey! Why aren't the
rest of you allowed?? And yes, Pip! He did forget his towel!
Hot tub and Hershey's bars! Valar, Legolas! Who can resist that?!!
I am glad that you are enjoying your stay in our mordon erth. It is quite a
wondrous place. But it is even more wondrous since you are in it now. :)
Elenath sila erin le!
**TreeHugger: *al hands Tree a red Elrond hankie 'cause she already knows she
needs another one* Thanks for the beta, mellon-nin! Hae Trea! Peepin duz waent a
beeg bruthur. I weel keap her fur a leedle seester tu. An I doe like Yeas Deer,
he maekz a grate Daed! Tael Nate buddie I sed hae! An Emma tu! *waevez tu Nate
an Emma* Yaes, all poar al got wuz a gleempz *weenkz* I wuld giv her muech moer!
*mooenz al* Knock that off, Legolas!**
Legolas, I need to know how to walk on snow without sinking in NOW before I take
this trip to Spokane. It hardly ever snows in SC. You are welcomed for the CPR
thing. I knew someday someone would finally enjoy it. I also taught Al her love
for chocolates. I like your picture. Love ya, Mom
**Mom: Iz it snoewin yeat? Yeas, dat al duz luv her choklats. Dere haz bean noe
snoew hear tu teech u snoewaelkin in. Com hoem suun!**
I wish you could see how excited Legolas gets over your messages to him. He is
just CRAZY about all of you! Send him a little note and tell him how much you
love him, and he promises to send one back to you next chapter!
Back To the Story: Chapter Eleven