Chapter 16 Reviews

**al and Legolas**

(Nancing Elf)
ROTFLMAO!!! I love drumsticks too! Visions of a gorgeous Prance racing down the
street after the ice cream truck! Ack...we've got snow on the ground
more ice cream trucks.
I like the Turkey day headgear Legolas is wearing. Very fetching.
*NE catches Legolas' keesez* Can Legolas pet me again? *cough* I LOVE being his
kitty! *grin* *NE rubs up against the Prance's legs, purring in contented
Gwibess Jr waves back. And she's giggling. She thinks your Legolas is cute!

Dear Legolas.
I like ice cream too. I especially like Breyers Mint Chocolate Chip.
When you come over I'll be sure to lick some off... erm... give you some. With
chocolate syrup. All over your... cone. Yeah.
I'm glad you have a good friend and writer like Al to show you all the
complexities of life in our modern world. Tell her to keep up the good work. And
then hurry up and get packed so you can come visit me before you go! I'm warming
up the Minivan right now.
**IRENA: *GROELZ* HAE DERE, BAYBEE!! I like meent choklit cheep tu! An I like
dat choklit surup dat gitz haerd whin u pud it oen ur koen. Due u hav sum of
dat? An mebbe a chearrie? Kin u teech me tu due dat thang wid my tung,

well, al i don't want to get on ur nerves, but: hurry!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;)
**Anja: I meesed u wile u wear goen! *Huegz an keesez!***

(The Two Princesses)
Hi Al, Hi Legolas,
Yes, our fishies have grown. We can see them properly now and are pretty sure
there are four!
Little Princess is feeling better, but bungs it on when you ask her!
You do so!
Do so!
Am not!
I'm the eldest, you're too young to go that far!
Are too!
M gives the two princesses - THE LOOK!
If anyone is going to go and live there, it will be me - now scoot! Isn't that
right Al? Legolas? Please excuse the errant princesses. They get a little
carried away at times & this weekend have been off the scale......
Would you like two princesses to take back with you to Middle Earth Legolas?
They would give Sauron a run for his money. Better yet, why not take me instead?
Galadriel and I could compare notes on the scary witch thing! Please,
Please......promise you will think about it?
**The Two Princesses: Hae Laedeez! I wuld lub tu hav u com liv wid me at alz
houese! It soendz like M neadz tu com da moest, doe. Ar u doen da Galadriel
thang oen my gurls, M? Bedder stoep dat! Hear iz a beeg skweeze of elbin lub fur
eech of u! *skweezee!* *skweezee!* *skweezee!* Noew eberybuddy goe hueg Gollum
fur me tu, okae?**

Hehehe! This is AWESOme! Hi, LEGGY! U r a GENIUS! I love leggy! He's like a
child, but it's great! *smiles*
**Nienor_raukwen09: Hae! Glaed u joynd us! al waentz tu now if u mint she iz a
gaenus, or I em. I sed u mint me fur shuer.**

hi i hope legolas is able to get back ok, and that he gets over his headache.
**Tenshi: my hedake iz muech bedder, thankz! Guud tu sea u! *Huegs* **

Ice cream, mmmm! It's a bit cold here for that now... :( So you like the
Teletubbies, Legolas? Each one to his own I guess, the tend to frighten me. Hope
you guys had a great Thanksgiving!
**Arilyn: poe iz my faeverit Taelietuebbie. I eben saew heem at da paraede on TV
fur Thaenksgeevin!**

(the_ringspell) cream
to bad your ice cream fell off that always happens to me, its not fun.
how are your spelling lessons going? How was your week? I hope all is well.
**the_ringspell: al gaev up oen da spaellin laessonz, doe Peepin duz steel trie.
An she bot me a neu ise kreem whin mine fael, soe I gess I em havin a perty guud

(Princess ArWen of sMirkwood)
LOL!Legolas you are soo cuuteee. Drumstick iz guud!Maybee you can haf it next
time. ;-)
**Princess ArWen of sMirkwood: Wuld u like tu hav haf of dis ise kreem I em
eetin? Hear u goe!**

Hello Leggy-less. I wasn't talking about rabbits by the way. Rabis is a disease
that al could probably explain to you better than I can. And since you aren't
emotionally damaged (too much, anyways) it appears that you haven't ran into any
fangirls. Have al explain to you what fangirls are too. Well, bye. ^.^
**laure: *bleenkz, luukz tu sea if laegz ar steel dere* I hav noet sean eni
faengurlz yaet, doe al iz karful wear she taekz me. We due lib in a leedle

Hi, Legolas and al and pippin and Yes Dear, It has been a long time since I have
written to you. Sorry but I am old and feeble. I love your hat and indian
feathers. I am glad that you did not put an ice cream cone on your head for Pick
your Poison. Save some hugs for me. Love ya, Mom
**Grammar Laedee: I tryd da ise kreem wonce fur shaempu, aeftr all it duz smael
guud, buet it maed my hare all steeky. Mebbe I deed not git it all ouet. Hearz a
hueg fur u! *huegs* **

(Lady Silence)
Ooh.. fabulous. (I just adore reading about your daily life with Legolas!!)
I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I know I did.. you have no idea how
hard it is to feed an army of undead penguins.
They always demand to go to the nearest salesmen convention so they can get an
'all you can eat buffet', so to speak.. *cough* Moving right along...
So let me get this straight..
The Ice Cream Guy thought Legolas was a girl?
Such evilness.. I mean sure Legolas is like the ultimate Bish, but geez... So
obvious that he's a guy. *waves to the majorly swoon worthy elf* Oh! Hope you
survived your ice cream headache!! They can be uber annoying.
But then again maybe the Ice Cream Guy did know he was a guy and therefore..
*blinks* Time to shut down the visuals in my mind.
Well either way, he should know better then to try picking up people in front of
Oh! Legolas, have you tried out the best sugary treat of all? Pez. It's the best
you know. You can just put it in your pocket and take it everywhere and the fun
thing is that you get dispensers for it that have nifty characters on them. Oooh
and Pixi Stix! You need those too. And Pocky. Yup. I should send you some. I
have tons.
Uh.. maybe I'll shut up now. I may be a self proclaimed Uber Goddess, but not
everyone enjoys reading the babble that I dish out.. so.. yeah.
~Silence, The Self Proclaimed Uber Goddess of the Omniverse, Who Spends Too Much
Time Thinking Up Really Long Titles for Her Name~
**Lady Silence: I thank it wuld bea haerd tu fead da peenwinz if dey wear alredy
ded. An I lub Pez! I have Laemb Choepz, an Saenta Kluaz, an Tweadea Beerd, an a
hoel buench moer!**

(Skye Rocket)
This is great! I know what Legolas means, it's hard to choose!
**Skye Rocket: I haed tu meeny choeeses. I mite hafta eet ise kreem all dae tu
deeside wich won I like baest.**

>gives Leggy a comforting hugnods
**Newmoon: *huegz tu u tu!* **

Greetings, Legolas Elvellon! Tree said she won't type this to you since you made
her cry by thinking she doesn't love you anymore. She doesn't understand why you
are so jealous of a man drawn on a piece of paper. She also says that after you
see that Victoria's Secret catalog then you will be drooling or something over a
girl on a piece of paper...or two or three or... Anyway, I think this manga
character looks like you, which is probably why she likes him. She has liked you
for almost a quarter of a century...she is getting rather old for a human, you
know. So I wouldn't let this paper man worry so much.
I was a bit worried about the title of this chapter. Poison is not good for
Elves you know. :( Then I saw it was about the Ice Cream Man. Ice cream, poison.
It must be one of those Modron Erth jokes I do not understand. We like ice cream
here too, but there aren't any in this place. We get ours from the store or the
man with the frozen food in the big yellow truck.
Legolas, I thought you were from Mirkwood not Sweden or Switzerland, so why did
you tell those little girls that? *scratches his head*
You should have let the ladies win the race, Elvellon. I know that you can run
faster than they can, you are an Elf after all, but it would be the nice thing
to do to let them win. It would make them feel good.
"Expected Behavior of Juvenile Customers" must be a book that women of "that"
age own and follow rather exactly. They do act like children sometimes. *looks
around guiltily to see where Tree is. She is still on the couch sobbing into her
stuffed spider* Hmmm...yes, she is very juvenile right now. She acts like a
teenager whose boyfriend just broke up with her.
al, why do you think Little Pip is a strange kid? It is a hard decision to
choose between an Ice Cream Sandwich and a Snowcone.
You make Orange Popups with toilet paper rolls, al?? That is very strange, and I
do not think the icecream would taste very good inside one of those.
I am wondering what ice cream you will choose, Elvellon. There are too many good
ones out there. So you got a Drumstick like al? They do not taste like chicken
at all, but they are very good. Does this mean you are nutty, too?
So the dog got your ice cream? Dogs will eat anything you drop on the ground.
Sometimes I do not even think they taste what they eat since they gobble it up
so fast. Get it?? Gobble for Thanksgiving?? Tree didn't think it was very funny,
she just told me to "Shut up, Elu." It is hard to live with a heartbroken woman.
Hey! Was that Ice Cream Man flirting with you? It sounds like he thinks you are
a girl. Wonder why??!! Sweetheart? *roars with laughter* It is a good thing that
al is there to protect your virtue! *laughs again*
Elvish Ice Cream Headache? Brainfreeze, Elvellon! Brainfreeze! That does hurt,
doesn't it!! al should have warned you, but you did eat it all before you got
back to the van. Ice cream should be eaten slowly! *chuckles* There were a lot
of firsts in that chapter, weren't there?
Hmmmm.....Well, Elvellon 19 days and counting. I hope you get over being mad at
Tree or she might die of grief or something. Woman! I do not understand them at
Elenath sila erin le! I have to type that or she will get mad at me, and when
she is in a bad mood you have to watch out! She is worse than any Orc I ever
met. Don't tell her I said that. Please.
**TreeHugger and Elu: I em not druulin ober eni of da Viktoereeaz Seekrit gurlz,
buet I due soe waent sum of dose buutz, an I wuld like to trie on doez weengz
tu! Moest of da wimin I noe doen't like fur u tu jest let dem ween. Dey waent u
tu at leest pertand u wuz trien tu beet dem. Leedle Peep iz straeng becuz she
likes her snoekone jest plane whin she kuld hav eni won of dose huendridz of
culurz oen it. Wuz I maed at Trea? I hav furgot all abot dat *wisselz Da Soeng
Dat Neber Eandz* **

(Undomiel Greenleaf)
Hey Legolas!!! Maybe afer Tree and everyone else gets doen with you (O_o), do
you want to come over to my house?? You can come to dance class with me! I'll
teach you Irish dancing, its reaaaaaaalllly fun! Then we can watch movies
together!!!! Whee! Sound like fun?? Okay!!
**Undomiel Greenleaf: Trea iz en lub wid sum maenga maen noew. U weel hafta wate
fur Irena an Puter Patty an Nancing Elf an. . . weel, da liest iz vary loeng. I
wuld like to trie dat daencin thaeng tho. Den I culd teech Gameli whin I git

LOL...that was funny!
Legolas, I bet you loved the ice-cream....pity about the Drumstick though...I
should treat you to an ice-cream one day. ^.^
Can't wait to hear what you have to tell me before you go....:)
**Estina: I hav loetz of thaengz tu tael u, buet al tipez so sloe! I doen't
thank we weel git tu all of da fuen thaengz beafour I hav tu goe. Thaenk u fur
tipin tu me!**

I just got back from France, and had some wonderful lavender bath salts and oils
for all of you, but some cocky customs guy stopped me at the airport. First he
holds me at arrow-point, which I thought was kinda strange, then he won't let me
enter. Finally he relents but blindfolds me and leads me to a secret room. He
opened my bags and discovered the bath stuff and I said it was presents for a
visitor from a 'greenwood' and his gracious hosts. Well, he gave me this
unnerving stare, and confiscated it -- turns out it was Haldir!! He asked where
'Legolas' was, saying he would deliver it himself, but I didn't tell him where
you were. Creepy Lorien elf. So if you get scented bath-product when you return
to Middle Earth, now you know, but I bet he's going to use it himself or give it
to Galadriel. Oh well, sorry.
**Loopy4_1: Haldir iz hear? Oen Modren erth? Bie da Valar, I neu he wuld com
luukin fur me! Kwik! Hied me! An he tuuk da labender baf saeltz tu? U ar rite,
Galadriel weel bea smaellin like a flouer beafour loeng. . . .**

(Lily Frost)
Mmn.. popsicles. My friends and I have a tradition--first snow of the year we
all go out and order ice cream(or iced coffee in my case--don't like soft ice
cream). Mostly for the weird looks we get. XD
You'd better be keeping Legolas away from us rabbid fan girls.. maybe you could
start by defining us. (Here's a comic a friend of mine drew of me catching
Legolas.. and I coloured
it. ^^ )
**Lily Frost: al sez if it snoez hear beafour I goe, she weel maek me an ise
kreem out of snoe. I noe hoew tu rite my naem en da snoe, but I neber maed ise
kreem frum it beafour.**

(Katherine The Celt)
I bet they did try! It's the baby blues, darling. And the hair. LOL.
Stay away from the drumsticks!! Once you start, it's a life long habit. Like
vodka. Ahem...
**Katherine: Kin u pued voedka en ise kreem?**

Lol! Ugh, I brain freezes. I can only imagine how worse they are for elves. Keep
**Lirenel: dat ise kreem weel giv u a baed hedake! Soendz like u hav haed won
tu? I em glaed u rote tu me!**

mmmm... chocolate. Ice cream is good huh? I saw your pic on the bio page.. very
cool! Happy thanksgiving!!!
on a brighter note it was my birthday on thanksgiving, Yaa!!
**ithinkineedanewname: Haeppie Burfdae! Deed u like my tuerkee haet? I maed it
misef. I hoep u goet loetz of guud praesantz!**

(SarWolf Snape)
Aww poor Legolas. *hugs* Sorry about your drumstick hun. Great chapter can't
wait for more.
**SarWolfe Snape: *huegz tu u* Datz okae, al got me unuthr won.**

You know, I thought the arm motion on the Legolas action figure WAS a
little...well, PG13.
Mmm ice cream...can't imagine a world without it. Ah...Ben & Jerry's.yummy
Legolas, you watch out for that Ice Cream Man. And other strange men. And
"rabbit faengurls" as well for that matter. If anyone comes up and says to you,
"I've got a piece of candy for you little boy, if you get in my car with me.",
you run away. Tsk tsk...what's the world coming to? Can't even let a grown elf
buy ice cream by himself without him being sexually harassed.
**Stimpy: Buet I like kaendie! Due u thank eniwon wuld giv me sum kaendie if I
wuld git en da kar wid dem? Iz it choklit? Okae!**

Hi Sweetie Pie! (gershwin is waving at Legolas). Have you recovered from you ice
cream headache? if you like ice cream, have al take you to Haagan Daz and buy
you some of their chocolate peanut butter flavor--since you like peanut butter
and chocolate, I am sure you will like that flavor. Or try the Ben and Jerry's
peanut butter cup flavor. And if you can't get either of those, have al buy you
some chocolate or vanilla ice cream, then put some peanut butter on top, and
then heat up some hot fudge and pour over the peanut butter and ice cream. It
tastes me. I have many years of experience in this department.
Hugs and kisses to you Legolas,--
Al--great detail on the first elvish ice cream headache--be glad Legolas doesn't
have any fillings--they make it so much worse:-)
**gershwin: *swoenz* She kalld me Sweaty Pye! al tuuk ur aedvise an let me trie
da peenuet budder an chokolit ise kreem, and ur rite, it IZ GUUD! Huegz an keesz
tu u tuu!**

Doesn't that always happen? The ice cream falls off the cone. Then they make you
pay for another one. :( That's why I eat it straight out of the carton.
**Eileen: al sed I culd noet eet ise kreem ouet of da kaertun uenlass I pud it
een a bowel.**

Hi! I loved that chapter - it was sooo funny! I think that holding auditions for
a new Legolas to be in the movie would be fun! How about that English actor.....
Orlando Bloom I believe he was called - he might look good in a blonde wig!
Poor Legolas - fancy never having tried ice cream before! And then getting hit
on by the ice cream man! Eeek! If you get that again just punch him!
Thankyou for your little bit of Elvish! I will now teach you some English *tries
to think of something that won't corrupt your Elvish mind.......*. Actually,
I'll have to get back to you on that one! I will take your advice and not eat
Keebler elf cookies in my bed! It won't be difficult, like I said - we don't get
them in England! :)Hmmm... can't think of anything else to write! Happy
Thanksgiving (although we don't have that either in England)! Don't eat too much
Big hugs and kisses (to rid you of your headache!)
Rachel xxx
**Magical Rachel: Thaenkz fur da beeg huegz an keesz. I deedn't eet tu muech
tuerkee, buet I deed eet loetz of coern, an poetaedoz, and draessin, an grean
beenz, an salid, an punkim pie! I thaenk Orlando wuld bea a guud choece tuu,
buet he iz suenin heemsef en da Karabeen rite noew pertandin tu bea a pyerat.**

Wow, you posted on Thanksgiving???!!! I'm glad I decided to steal a few minutes
away from and check! Yay!
"Pick Your Poison"...yikes, I don't like the sound of this chapter. Sounds like
Legolas is about to get into trouble again.
Ha, love the description of the procuring of ice cream from the ice cream truck.
The ice cream man is indeed a bad person. I'm glad I grew up outside the city--I
was never tempted by his evil offerings.
Hilarious--I never knew they had a manual.
Uh-oh. The ice cream man called him honey?! Is that the Galadriel smell I
getting a whiff of right now?
Uh! Poor Legolas! (c. TH) He dropped his ice cream! Oh, how sad!
Oh boy. He whines? Too funny.
That ice cream man is creepy. I'd keep an eye on him al!
Hmmm, I think I could watch Legolas eat his ice cream all day long. It sounds
like he really enjoys the sticky, creamy goodness--very tantalizing.
Brain Freeze!!!! Why didn't you warn him, al? Poor Prance!
Whew, at least Legolas won't need any stomach pumping, which is what I was
afraid of when I saw this chapter.
Hey Legolas, I don't think you have to worry about the Long Shank Show making it
onto cable...well, unless it's Pay-Per-View. And I do *love* the view! But we
can just keep as a private showing, just for me. Okay? :-)
Great chapter, al! Thanks for the update on what happening in Legolas' life.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Write On!
**Puter Patty: Leat me discrieb fur u hoew I eet my ise kreem agin. Furst, I
sloelie peal bak da raeppr soe I kin sea all dat kreemie guudniss ensied, den I
braeng it up kloes tu my noez soe I kin smael all da eunik flaevurz, den I . . .
Legolas! This is rated PG-13! Quit that! *weenkz an blueshez* **

(Eve of Mirkwood)
ha ha ha ha!! oh, legolas, you poor elf! the ice cream man was hitting on you!!
please, write another chapter!we love you legolas!
**Eve of Mirkwood: I lub u tu! Iz dat whut dat ise kreem maen wuz doen? *
groelz* **

Hello again!
i hope you like your ice-cream!
i hate cold headaches, don't you? got my first in the states when i ate my
ice-cream to fast... ooh, my poor head...
anyway, have fun in the next chapter!
**Endomiel: hae agin! Dat ise kreem hedake deed huert!**

**blue eyed babe: Hae! Itz guud tu sea u! Glaed u maed it hear! I doent noe if I
culd eet graepz 24/7 (dey giv me turrable dierreea), but thaenkz fur da oeffr.
*huegz fur u!* **

Back To the Story: Chapter Seventeen